


Constant Tides

by Lowkey7



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, M/M, Merman Bucky, Merperson Bucky Barnes, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Stucky - Freeform, mermaid, mermaid au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-03
Updated: 2018-07-27
Packaged: 2018-07-29 02:28:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 52
Words: 31,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7666777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lowkey7/pseuds/Lowkey7
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Steve meets merman Bucky at the beach at a young age, his life forever changed. </p><p>After loosing him, will Steve let go of the past or try to get him back?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was so long ago by now that it could have been out off as just a dream, but Steve would always believe that he actually meet a real merman. 

It was the end of August, where the sun was warm but the air was starting to become cold and crisp. Steve was only about five years old, and skinny as a stick. He and his parents were going on their last vacation, right before the start of school. It wasn't really too cold outside but Steve's mom bundled him up with a scarf and jacket, due to Steve's fragility. 

A friend of the family had let them borrow their beach house on this particular summer and Steve was more than excited to see the ocean and the sand. He loved the city with all his heart but it was extraordinary to see the difference in scenery. He packed his tattered backpack full of stuff: clothes, extra shoes, books, a flashlight, everything that the wearing bag could hold. Most of it would probably be useless but the idea of adventure excited him. 

Steve jumped out of the car and pulled down his jacket that had ridded up after sitting for so long. His mom followed him out with the keys to the beach house in hand, as his dad pulled away to go find a place to park. Steve grab his mom hand as she said, "Let's go check it out." with a big smile. The sand was soft under their feet and they tried to keep balance on the changing surface. Steve marveled at the white and blue striped metal lighthouse that sat right next to the beach cottage. It was so tall in comparison and cast a giant shadow across half the beach. The light had been left on by the man that lent them the house. He said they didn't have to worry about switching it on and off each day and it would be fine to just let it run while he was gone. 

The beach house in comparison was made of wood and was short but wide. As they got closer to it, Steve's mom gave Steve's hand a squeeze before letting go to find which of the three keys on the metal ring was the one to the house. Steve jumped up onto the porch and sat on the cute little yellow bench that sit looking out at the ocean. It was beautiful and such a deep blue and he could smell the salt water. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Wind chimes whistled with the air that hang on the frame of the porch and Steve was so happy were he was right now.

The door creaked open, waking him up from his moment of peace and it was back to the excitement of being in a whole new place. He sat up a little too quickly, and his head spun a little, but he brushed it off quickly and ran through the doorway past his mom, who trying to get out the key that got stuck in the door. It was mostly wood inside and looked a lot like he had expected. Little boats in bottles, and a cozy fireplace, a small kitchen, and some pictures of the owner holding big fish. It seemed just like a little cliche house on the beach, and he loved it. He ran upstairs to put his backpack in a bedroom right before his mom called out to him. 

"Steve!" She cooed, "Before you go exploring I want you to eat something, that was a long car ride." Although he wanted to look around the rest of the rooms and then go to the beach, he was starving. His excitement hushed down and he sat with his mom and she unpacked snacks she brought and took out glasses and plates from the cupboards. Soon, his dad walked in and they all sat together, enjoying where they where going to spend the next week.


	2. Chapter 2

It was getting too dark to go outside that night so Steve just explored the house and made himself comfy in the guest room while his parents settled into the main bedroom. 

The next morning his was up before anyone else and quickly got to getting ready for the day. Although he was only five, he tried his best to dress himself, being able to zipper but not button his pants and just stuffing his shoelaces into his shoes instead of tying them. He took the clothes, tooth brush, comb, and other useless things out of his backpack and only kept the fun things, ready for adventure. 

He crept into his parents bedroom and with a whisper asked, "Are you up?" His mom hummed and stirred to look at Steve and chuckled a little at the state of him: hair flying every direction, shoelaces threatening to pop out of his little sneakers, shirt half tucked in, jacket inside out. She motioned him over to her and she fixed him up. 

Then she looked into his eyes and smiled, "Where do you think you're going?" with a bit of a laugh. "Out exploring!" He chimed, which caused his dad to finally start to wake. He looked at Steve through squinted, tired eyes, and grinned a little. "I dunno" Steve's mom returned, "You're a little young to go one your own, how about you wait for us downstairs and we'll go together later?" Steve lowered his smile and let out a little moan. "But, please, I'll be so so careful!" He argued. His mom looked over to see what her partner thought. His dad gave another grin, another chuckle, shock his head a little and said "Don't go past the dock, and stay an arm's length from the water. Steve's eyes widened with excitement "Joseph." Steve's mom said quickly and sternly, but Steve's dad quickly nodded his head towards the door motioning Steve to leave with he can.

He scurried out the door and heard a bit of arguing coming from inside the bedroom but he left with a huge smile. It was a lot cloudier today and it looked like it would storm in about an hour, maybe less. Steve first thought to build a sandcastle but he definitely didn't want it to be torn down right away by rain, so maybe sandcastles were for another day. He then thought about exploring the beach but his dad told him to not go past the dock and the dock was only a few feet away from the house, still visible if you turned your head to the left and looked through the living room window, which meant there wasn't much "exploring" to be done. 

Eventually he just decided to collected shells. He got a few pretty little ones, but he knew the really good, bigger ones, were in the shallow bit of the water and he wasn't allowed in the water. He stuffed the few shells he got into the pocket of his pants and looked up at the beach house. The lights were still off upstairs, suggesting that his parents fell back asleep. The clouds looked heavy but it was still a little light, suggesting he had more time. 

He slowly sauntered over to the wooden dock. His dad told him not to go past the dock but he never said anything about going onto it. It was far enough away from the house that the outside light that hung next to the door was dim and barley visible in the incoming fog. He put one foot on the wood surface before thinking about whether his dad would wake up and yell at him for being over here, but he decided that even though it was very close to the water and a bit far away, it was still ok. The wood creaked as he walked and he noticed that some of the planks looked newer than others, like they had just been replaced. He came to the edge of the planks and sat down cross-legged.

Steve looked back one more as if suddenly his parents would be right behind him to scorn him for being so close to the edge, but no one was there but him. Feeling a little risky, he uncrossed his skinny legs and let them dangle off the side, just barley touching the cold water. He shivered a little and grew a small smile. It was amazing to finally feel the water, despite how cold it was, and he was feeling a little buzzed from being rebellious. 

Suddenly he saw a ripple in the once steady water. It was quit a ways away from him but the steady water around his feet now lapped at his ankles. Steve didn't even realized before how loud the seagulls had been, until now, everything when quiet and still. Another ripple ran through the water, closer to him. It wasn't even that the movements in the water were that big, but the sudden movements in the still water were jarring and Steve slowly took one foot out of the water. He put his hand behind his back, ready to push himself up to leave, when suddenly a giant fin jumped out of the water. Water splashed in his face and he jumped in shock, making the old plank of wood he was sitting on snap with a horrifyingly loud crack, sending him straight into the water. Steve could swim but between the shock, his young age, his heavy coat and scarf, and how tiny he was, there was no chance, and luck was not on his side. He hadn't realized the dock was above such deep water until he was sinking slowly to bottom, watching as the surface disappeared from him while he struggled waving his arms up and down to try to pull himself up even a little bit. The salt water stung his eyes and the cold water now felt freezing. Slowly he began to stop thrashing, his body giving in. 

Suddenly, he felt hands on him.


	3. Chapter 3

Just as quickly as he fell in, he was pulled to the surface. His eyes watered and his coughed roughly and hard like he was having an asthma attack. He didn't know what was happening or why as his took in the biggest breath of his life and began to rub his eyes furiously, trying to be able to see what was happening through the sting of the salt. 

Right as he opened his eyes he was thrown on the beach, which quickly made him quickly concentrate on what was happening, as he let out an audible "Oof". He saw two blue-grey eyes looking very concerned, before going into another coughing fit. He felt a wet hand on his back, patting him awkwardly but quickly, like it really wanted to help but had absolutely no idea what to do. 

Steve's eyes started to water again from all the coughing and he was starting to feel completely frozen and stiff. Hs coughing slowed and he tried to wipe his eyes clean again despite nothing dry to help him. But as he rubbed his eyes with his wet hands, he felt a lot better. He was winded and weak and freezing but he also felt safe and full of air and so much better than a minute before, so he finally was able to look back up at those eyes.

He realized it was a boy, with short brown hair that sort of swooped to the side in a wet lump. He looked young, at most only a year older than him, but he was a lot bigger than Steve (most people were though). It was his hands that were on Steve's back and they had stopped patting him and were now just resting on him lightly. He was looking at Steve's chest, watching his chest go in and out and he breathed deeply. 

Suddenly, Steve jumped and the boy jolted quickly changing his gazing from Steve's chest to his eyes. Steve rubbed his eyes again and craned his neck out to make sure what he was seeing was real. The boy seemed to be peppered with scales, appearing in little patches randomly on his body and behind him was a fish tail? A fish tail attached to him? 

Steve tried to look around the boy's head and chest to try to make sense of what he was seeing. The boy suddenly seemed less concerned with Steve and more self conscience about himself. He looked at his tail were Steve was looking and jumped, as if it was the first time he realized what he was. He looked back and Steve and then darted into the deeper water with a splash, a little clumsily since they were on a really shallow part where the water just kissed the sand. 

"Wait!" Steve tried to yell, but his throat stung and he was still getting breath into him. Steve tried to follow after the boy, looking at the ripples he left in the water, but just as Steve started to step back into the water, his teeth began to chatter loudly and he realized again just how cold he was, being to run back to the house, a little hesitantly, hoping he would see that boy again.


	4. Chapter 4

As he got closer to the house he heard the rumble of thunder, signifying the start of the storm and saw his mom craning over the porch. She practically screamed when she saw him, all wet with red eyes. She hadn't even gotten into her clothes yet, with her tan robe wrapped around her yellow and red polkadot pajamas. 

"Steven! What happened!?" She screeched. Steve wanted to tell his mom all about what happened with the half fish half boy, even though there wasn't really much to tell. However, just as he opened his mouth, to speak and tell her everything, something told him to stop. It wasn't out of protection from himself, knowing he wasn't supposed to be that close to the water, (well maybe it was a little) but more so for the protection of that other boy. Steve didn't really know who, or what the boy was, or what he was doing, or why he saved him, but he knew that he wanted that boy to be safe too. 

"I..I was at the dock and the wood broke!" Steve finally stuttered through, trying to keep eye contact. His mom gasped loudly. From the other room, Steve could see his dad rushing towards them with towels. He didn't even realize his dad was up or that he knew he was soaking wet. The towels were wrapped around him as soon as his mom peeled of the still very damp clothes. His mom insisted that the fireplace be light to warm him up but the rain was already starting, coming down through the chimney. Instead, he was carried by his dad to his room and bundled under all the blankets they could find. Happy to be home and warm again, he drifted to sleep in his cocoon of blankets. 

He woke up to a large crack of lightning and a very dark room. Steve blinked a few times and rubbed his eyes to make out the bright 1:00 AM in bright green digits on the digital clock next to his bed. His giant layers of blankets were still wrapped around him and he sat upright for a minute or two, just sitting in the darkness. He looked out to the window and just barley saw the rain hitting the glass, only light but a sliver of the moon that just barley shown through the storm clouds. He knew he should go back to sleep but he had been resting for hours and hours and was more than ready to get up.

He untangled himself from the sheets and when he stood up he almost tripped on the slippers that his mom had put by his bedside. He shimmied them onto his feet, and slipped toward the door. He opened it cautiously, hoping his parents were far enough into their sleep that they wouldn't hear him creeping around. 

The stairs creaked with almost every step, but his parents seemed to be completely out from all the excitement of today, and Steve was glad he wouldn't have to make another excuse for being where he shouldn't be. Right by the fireplace was a huge window with a little ledge that was perfect for Steve to sit on. He grabbed a pillow from the couch on his way and sat down, holding the pillow between his legs and stomach. 

The moon was a bit more visible from this angle and he could see a lot more. The water was going ballistic with waves crashing into each other over and over. The rain was even heavier than he thought it would and everything looked like a VHS tape with lines constantly streaking through the world. Thunder boomed loudly, and despite a few really big ones that surprised him and made him jump, but the loud noises didn't scare him. Lighting would always make everything freeze for a minute. It was like a little sneak peak of what he will see in the actual daily light. It hit the horizon continuously and one time Steve even swore the lighting hit the lighthouse. 

Steve sat there for almost the whole night. He was scared. Not because of the loud noises of the thunder, or the heavy rain pounding on the glass in front of him. He was scared for the boy, and if he would be ok in that big storm.


	5. Chapter 5

Bucky had been lost for maybe two days now. He knew his parents would find him soon, but the storm could delay them any amount of time, from a day to a week. He was usually a very brave and confident young merman but after two days of barley eating and not seeing any of his friends or family, he found himself more and more scared. He was scared and alone..that was until he saw that little skinny kid hanging by that dock.

He was alone, just like Bucky was and it made his feel a lot less scared in a way, and more so his confident, curious self. But as he tried to get closer the kid just straight up fell in! It was terrifying but exciting and Bucky thought fast swimming as fast as he could to get to him and drag him back up to the surface. The kid at least started breathing right away and thank goodness too, Bucky had no idea how he would possibly resuscitate him if he had to, he was only a kid himself, let alone a different species. 

He dropped him on the sand a little too hard and immediately regretted being too cocky in his victory, because the kid started choking again almost right away. Bucky knew he should leave and that he wasn't supposed to be seen, but maybe this kid was alone and scared too, I mean he did almost drown. He didn't understand why but this kid made him comfortable and warm and he wanted to stay by him and make sure he was okay. 

But before he knew it the kid was looking right at him, and it felt much more frightening then it did a minute ago. The kid looked at him with confused and awed eyes and Bucky had no idea why he was still sitting with this kid. He didn't have any idea what to do and his first instinct was to leave. So he jumped into the water as fast he could and swam. 

As fast as Bucky was, he barley got out of few of the dock before the storm crept in. Immediately, he knew he had to go deeper into the water so if lightning stuck he would be alright. He dove straight now were he was. It was deep enough that he knew he'd be alright, but wasn't as deep as he wish it had been, to have the water cover him like a blanket and hide him from the terrifying display of the storm. 

All the while, the water moved him closer and closer to shore and he found himself holding onto rocks so he would stay in this moderately deep spot. As he hugged himself to the boulders, he wished his parents were here to find a cave for them or to just hold him steady in a big grounding hug and not some stupid boulder that was scratching his arms and turning his hands red. 

He also caught himself wishing for that kid to come back, to tell him "You're not alone." and make him feel like himself again like he did earlier. But the storm also made him think horrible things. What if his parents never found him? What if he can't find any food? What if he wasn't deep enough and lighting does hit him? And worst of all he worried that that kid died, because he ran away and left him on the beach by himself. Caught up in his own mind, Bucky sat through the night, wishing with everything he's got to see that boy in the morning.


	6. Chapter 6

In the middle of the night, Bucky must have fallen asleep and let go of the rocks; he woke up and was shocked to be right on the shore of beach. Quickly, he scrambled back into water, hoping nobody had seen him. But, just as he was about to swim deeper into the ocean, he heard a noise. 

The footsteps of the three people walking out of the house was shockingly loud, despite Bucky being even farther than the dock. It made him jump at first, but as soon as he saw a little scrawny kid running out in front of the two others, his heart fluttered with excitement. 

___________

Steve wasn't the happiest about his parents feeling the need to join him on his adventures, but he understood why they were worried after he well...almost drowned on their second day of vacation. 

His jacket still felt a little damp around the pockets, but his scarf was completely dry. He felt extremely lucky that he left his backpack by the porch before he went by the dock. If some of the stuff in that bag got wet, they would have been finished, like his books or his drawings. 

Even though Steve was still physically drained a bit from yesterday's short but crazy events, he was mentally hyped. He didn't care as much about building his sandcastle or getting the prettier shells by the shore. He wanted to find that boy, or half boy, or whoever it was that saved him. 

He ran out in front of his parents. The sand was littered with sticks and seaweed and all other kinds of things that the storm brought about. He thought quickly and turned around to his parents. 

"I'm gonna go find treasures in the sand!"

There was a quick pause before anyone answered,

"Alright. Be safe!" His mother returned.

It was the perfect excuse to explore. He still had to be careful, his parents were watching him closely. He turned back around and knew the first place he had to check out was the dock, but his parents wouldn't want him back there after what happened last time he was there. He started to make his was over to that area, but kept far away from the dock itself, picking up things in the sand and pretending to examine them before throwing them back down.

When he was right next to the dock, he bent down, acting like he found something in the sand. Briefly, he glanced at his parents. They seemed to have relaxed a little, but were very hesitant, still taking a peeks over their shoulders.  

He felt safe enough to start looking towards the water instead of the ground. He scanned the water quickly, then look back at his parents, just as a double precaution. They seemed to be moving on to other things. He looked back up to the water, twisting his neck to get an extra good look at the front of the dock where the boy had saved him. But the boy wasn't there. 

Steve was starting to think maybe he just made up the boy with the fish tail, until something hit him right on his left cheek. 

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

Whatever hit him fell on the ground and Steve bent over to pick it up. It was a little pebble, no bigger than his thumb nail. Before he could even process why a pebble attacked him out of nowhere, another one hit him right on the forehead.

Although this pebble was only a little bit bigger than the first, Steve let out an "Oww!" before covering his mouth and hoping his parents hadn't heard. He looked back to see them laughing together back on the porch bench, and he let out a deep breath of relief. 

He rubbed his forehead and furrowed his eyebrows, remembering that there were pebbles being pelted at him. As he turned around to look away from his parents, he saw a figure in the water with an arm raised in the arm and Steve beamed with happiness. 

He tried to go slow enough so the rush of his movements wouldn't distract his parents, though all he wanted to do was run to that boy. As he got closer, the boy had already dropped him arm down and was grinning just as widely as Steve, but with slightly sharper teeth. His tail was outstretched behind him and he was resting on his elbows now, like a yoga pose. Steve noticed that the boy's scales reflected in the sunlight, shimmering grey, blue, and pink, somehow all at the same time. They were the most beautiful things Steve had ever seen. 

When Steve actually reached shore their cheek to cheek grins had relaxed into slight smiles and they both just stared at each other, as if they didn't really think this through and didn't actually know what to do when they finally found each other. The boy in the water shifted a little, becoming uncomfortable with the staring and Steve quickly said, "Hello!" trying to ease the tension. 

Th boy furrow his eyebrows, smiled a little wider, and cocked his head, as if he did except Steve to talk to him but was glad that he did. 

"I'm uhh...Steve, what's your name?" Steve continued. The boy took in a breath, as if he was about to say something, but instead just furrowed his eyebrows more. Steve didn't even think of it until know, but he guessed the boy could breathe on land. He wondered if he was like a turtle or something and had to come up for air. The boy's tail slapped the shallow water and Steve was brought back to what was actually happening. 

"Oh! Um, can you not talk? Do you understand me?" He felt kinda stupid for not wondering before, but suddenly the boy in front of him gave out a giggle. It was harsh and sounded wheezy, but it was a distinct giggle if Steve had ever heard one, and it was contagious making Steve do a little laugh. 

"No, no, I can talk" The boy piped, even though it sounded like he hadn't used his voice in years. "My names Bucky" 

"Bucky" Steve repeated with a smile. 


	8. Chapter 8

They got off right away, trying to keep their hysteric laughs quiet to hide from Steve's parents:

 

 

"Why'd you throw a rock at me!" Steve had laughed out.

"It was a pebble at best, and I was about to throw another too!" Bucky admitted.

"Jerk" Steve snorted.

"Punk"

~

"Do you live here?" Bucky asked.

"No, just staying the week." Steve said with a frown.

"When did you get here?" 

"Two days ago" 

"And you already drowned yourself?!"

Bursting out laughing, Steve tried to shush them through giggles. 

~

"Why'd you come back?" Steve asked "I thought I scared you off yesterday."

"I just wanted to make sure you were alright." Bucky said coyly 

~

"So James is your real name?" wondered Steve.

"Yeah, but it doesn't suit me, ya know?" 

"I like Bucky a lot better"

They shared a smile

~

Their conversations when on and on and every so often Steve's parents would yell over to him and ask if he was okay but they never came over and they never got suspicious. He kept close enough so they could share their whispered conversations, but far enough away so he didn't get any water on his clothes.  

Steve hoped Bucky's parents found him soon, but something greedy in him hoped they would be just a few days late so he could spend more time with his new best friend. Bucky promised he would return to this spot tomorrow, but they still didn't want to leave each other. However, when the sun began to set, turning the sky the most beautiful gold and orange, they could hear the chatting of Steve's parents, coming to retrieve their son, they knew it was time to say goodbye. 

Bucky splashed away as last minute as he could, and Steve quickly picked up some junk on the beach to show his parents that he was just on the sand all day. 

His parents made small talk with him on the way back to the house saying,

"Maybe we'll swim tomorrow if you're up for it." and "Dad might take a look at the dock to see if he can fix the broken plank."

But Steve didn't really listen. All he could think about was what he and Bucky talked about. How Bucky was a merman and how he could breathe on land and in the water but he can dry out on land if he's there for to long. How Bucky lost his parents and how he ended up here. How he braved the storm but worried about Steve all night. 

Even though Bucky was a merman and Steve was a human, they didn't see it that way. They felt like equals and they didn't really care what species each other was. They each had maybe a questions or two for each other but otherwise whatever they _were_ wasn't really important to them. They really just loved each other for their personalities.

Steve missed Bucky even though he just saw him a minute ago. He hoped Bucky missed him too. He wondered where Bucky slept and if he was comfy. He wanted Bucky to be happy and with his family again, but he alway didn't want to lose his best friend.

 

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

Steve was up early and had already planned what he wanted to do with Bucky today, build a sandcastle! Talking was a lot of fun yesterday but Steve was extremely excited to now have someone he could do activities with during his vacation.

He dumped out his backpack and filled it with two shovels and a pail, along with the little tiny flag he made out of a tooth pick and a piece of ribbon just for this moment.

He also tucked a drawing or two of his in the little front pocket of the bag. Bucky had asked the other day if he could see Steve's drawings but the ones he had in his bag already weren't his favorite and he only wanted to show Bucky his best work. Last night Steve even sketch a little pencil drawing of his new merman friend. 

The art Steve made was still a little rough around the edges, but incredibly well done for a five year old. He didn't really want to be become an artist or anything when he got older, but because of his size and health issues it was the perfect hobby for him. 

His parents were much more relaxed today, with the dock incident being further behind them, but they still wanted Steve to wait for them to go outside with him. In the kitchen his mom had already scrambled some eggs and set it on the counter for him with a glass of juice. He shoveled a few bites into his mouth but he was anxious to go see his friend, and he didn't want to keep him waiting. Even more so, he knew Bucky's parents could find him at any day to take him home, so he wanted to spend as much time with him as he could. 

Steve began to tap his foot impatiently. 

"We'll go out soon, just wait." His dad said.

Steve sighed deeply and sunk to the floor. His parents eyed him. He let out another sigh, dramatically and sunk further so his head rested on his chest.

"Fine, just go." His mom gave in with a laugh.

He beamed and ran out the door, heading straight to the place he and Bucky hung out yesterday beyond the dock. 


	10. Chapter 10

Steve was overjoyed to see Bucky was already waiting for him. Bucky was waving to him and Steve did a little jog over, smiling all the way. 

"Finally" Bucky joked as Steve sat down on the sand in front of him. Steve took a few breaths, tired from the little jog and smiled up at him. He saw Bucky was smiling too but his eyes were droopy and his skin looked paler than he remembered. 

Steve's smile dropped a little as he asked, "Are you alright?" 

"Yeah, I'm fine." Bucky answered a little too quickly. "Did you bring those drawings?" quickly changing the subject and eying Steve's backpack. 

Steve hesitated, raising an eyebrow, but let it go, getting excited over showing his friend what he made. He unzipped the bag and took out the drawings.

"Uhh...maybe you shouldn't touch them," He said looking at Bucky's wet webbed hands. "But I can just put 'em like this" He continued laying all them out on the sand between them. 

Bucky awed over the drawings, saying how he wished he could draw and how he _loved_ the sketch Steve did of him. With blushed cheeks, Steve gathered up his art, telling how he can make Bucky more drawings anytime. 

"I was thinking maybe we could build a sandcastle!" Steve said, removing the shovels from his old backpack. 

With a playful splash of his tail, Bucky lifted his head significantly higher. "I've always wanted to make a sandcastle on land but was never allowed to!" He said with a huge smile. He still looked exhausted but this idea seemed to give him an extra burst of energy and Steve handed him a red shovel. 

"Lets make a tower here, and a tower here," Bucky said as he made marks in the sand.

"And maybe a moat around here!" Steve added drawing a big circle around Bucky's marks.

"Yes!" he replied, as he move from his stomach to sitting upright, allowing Steve to see Bucky's thinning body.

"You're not okay!" Steve almost yelled, worrying for a second that his parents might have heard, and then going back to Bucky.

Bucky was now the one blushing and he crossed his hands over his stomach.

Steve furrow his brows and looked at Bucky, who was trying to avoid any eye contact. He began to remember how just last night night he was wishing Bucky's parents would be late finding him, and immediately felt a swarm of regret.

"You need to eat something." He finally decided on saying. "I can get something from the kitchen, just wait."

He got up quickly and began running to the house. 

 


	11. Chapter 11

Running to the house, Steve remembered his parents were still in the kitchen. He knew he would have to make an excuse as to why he was raiding the kitchen after his mom had just made him breakfast. 

He slowed at the door and slowly turned the metal handle, hoping his parents for some reason left. But as soon as his head popped through the door, his dad looked up from his newspaper and his mom cocked her head.

"Done already?" She asked. 

"Umm no," he replied very unsmoothly, "Jussst..grabbing some crackers." 

He slid to the pantry pulling the old wood doors open. There wasn't much in there except the few snacky foods his parents brought for their trip and a box of cereal that owner must have left. 

Steve opened his empty tattered backpack and started shoveling everything and anything in from behind the doors. 

"But you just ate, Sweetie. Did you not like the eggs?" His mom asked with worried eyes.

Quickly he replied, "No! Just uh...feeding the fishes!" while internally giggling. 

His dad chuckled and returned to his newspaper, making his mom relax too. 

"It might be too rocky for any fish around here, so don't be disappointed if you don't see any." She explained.Steve exhaled. No wonder Bucky was so thin, there weren't any fish around! 

"Okay, love you!" He said, remembering that he had to get back to Bucky. While Steve ran out the door he heard a quick "Have fun!" and hoisted his backpack higher onto his shoulders.

He waved to Bucky as he ran over, who was still waiting for him but he was deeper in the water then he was before. 

Upon arriving at their spot, Steve slid on the sand and unzipped his bag, dumping everything out. Potato chips, crackers, a few cookies, and pretzels scattered everywhere. 

"Any of these ok?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for being so nice, it means everything to me.
> 
> I'm writing this story for myself, so sorry if it's not perfect, but sharing it with you guys is really a treat and I appreciate every kudo, bookmark, and comment you have. <3


	12. Chapter 12

Bucky had never had any of these snacks before and he was beyond apprehensive when Steve poured them out on the sand. Steve started to open a small box of crackers and began eating them, showing Bucky that they were good and fine. He handed him one of the salty squares and Bucky held it lightly. The water on his hands began to make the edges soggy, and Bucky quickly decided to just toss the whole thing in his mouth before it completely became mush. 

His eyes light up immediately from the odd taste. It was crunchy like a crab, but didn't taste anything like one, and the salty flavor made him feel at home. Immediately asking for another, Steve handed him the box and lit up with a giant smile. 

Steve felt like he was paying Bucky back for saving him. At that moment, there was nothing better than seeing Bucky's face and his cheeks filled with food as he stuffed pretzel after chip into his mouth. 

Ripping into another bag of treats, Bucky couldn't tell if all this food was really that good, or if he was just starving, but he really didn't care. He was just so happy to be eating and with a friend and feeling like himself again. 

As they ate together, they resumed construction on their sandcastle. It wasn't the most well crafted piece, with a few falling walls, and many failed attempts at windows, but the boys were extremely proud of their work, taking the little flag in both of their hands and sticking it on top together. 

They laughed and talked on the warm golden beach. Steve tried to show Bucky how to draw in the sand and Bucky would go into the water and bring Steve shells and rocks. 

It was a little past noon when Steve's parents finally came outside and called to Steve. Steve called back saying he was playing in the sand and he was alright. 

"Wanna go swimming?" His dad yelled.

"Uh, no that's alright." He said looking at Bucky, who smiled up at him. 

"Okay, we'll be over here!" His mom called. 

Steve relaxed back to Bucky and fidgeted with the sand. 

"You don't want to go swimming?" Bucky asked.

Steve grinned, "Well yeah, but I wanna hang out with you more!"

Bucky grinned back with a little mischief in his eyes and held out his hand,

"Why don't you do both?" 


	13. Chapter 13

There was quite a bit of convincing Bucky needed to do, but eventually Steve gave in. He was most concerned about his parents, what if they called for him while he was underwater, what if they saw him, but Bucky assured that he would be able to hear his parents and he keep them away from where they were. 

Steve sighed as he wrangled to get everything off except his underwear, leaving the rest of his stuff well away from the water so they wouldn't get wet. He involuntarily shivered, not realizing how cold it actually was today, despite the perfectly warmed sand. Bucky snorted at his naked shivering friend, insisting that it would be better once he was actually in the water. 

He dipped a toe in the beautifully clear water and instantly jumped back. "It's even colder in the water!" he complained. 

Bucky laughed hardily. "Just get in," He said, shaking his head and grinning. 

Looking at the water, Steve closed his eyes and decided to just go for it. He rushed in, trying not to make too much noise for his parents to hear. His teeth chattered and he hugged himself with his arms, glaring at Bucky, who was trying to suppress his loud laughter. Bucky, himself, had already shimmied off the beach and more into the water in a part where he was just able to flick his tail without hitting the sandy floor. 

"Come on," Bucky called as he held out his hand towards Steve. Steve unwrapped a hand just enough so he could touch Bucky's and he was immediately dragged further into the water. 

"Wait, you can swim right?" Bucky asked pensively. "Of course I can swim!" Steve laughed and unwrapped his other hand so he could splash Bucky. Bucky immediately splashed back and they both giggled before Bucky said, "Hold your breath." As Steve obeyed, Bucky grabbed Steve a little more tightly and dragged him down in the cold ocean and moved further into deeper water.

Curious, Steve tried to open his eyes despite the sting of the salt water. He was surprised to see how rocky it actually was over here, as Bucky swerved and weaved them through, heading towards a clearer part up ahead. It was extremely beautiful. Although there wasn't really vegetation or other life here, there were so many different rocks and shells that infested the ocean floor. Steve saw as he past them, how some of the shells changed colors just like Bucky's scales, shimmering pinks and yellows. Their were giant rocks that looked pointy and harsh too but other small rocks that looked as round as beach balls and shimmered silver while they swam by. 

He just started to feel pain in his chest when Bucky pushed him towards the surface and Steve let in deep breath of air. They were in the much clearer part of the water with hardly anymore boulders in their way. They was a lot farther into the water then he thought they had gone, realizing just now how fast Bucky was swimming. He couldn't see his parents but he could easily see the tall lighthouse and it's glowing top, along with a bit of the beach house. 

Bucky swam a circle around him, bringing Steve back to where they were. Steve looked at him and smiled, so happy to be in the water but safe this time. He was about to thank his friend for convincing him to come out here when Bucky took a big mouthful of water and spat in Steve's face laughing. Steve was on it right away taking a big gulp of water and aiming. 

They splashed around and explore the water for what seemed like only a few minutes but ended up being hours before Bucky alerted Steve that he heard his parents getting up. 

As Bucky guided them back to the shore, Steve wished he could live in this moment everyday. He knew that he only had three more days left of his vacation, and Bucky's parents could find him anytime. He closed his eyes and hoped this memory would stay with him forever. 


	14. Chapter 14

It had been a long, wonderful day. Bucky loved spending time with Steve. He was kind, funny, and brave, and they really seemed to understand each other. 

After Steve had left, Bucky lingered for a few minutes to admire their sandcastle before the tide would take it away forever. He chuckled and shook his head as he looked at their horrible attempt at a moat and their sad excuse for windows. The golden walls were slowly being lapped at by the water, destroying it bit by bit. He watched as their creation became just a mound of sand, quickly taking the little red flag off the top right before the water snatched it. 

Holding it in between his pointer finger and thumb, he twirled it around and thought of Steve. He thought maybe Steve could come back next summer and they could see each other every year. Bucky's parents would probably let him come back here, but he knew it wasn't Steve's house here and he couldn't decide if he got to stay in it. Bucky sighed and swam away from the shore, still holding onto the flag. 

He got to the clearing he showed Steve earlier today, and stuck the little toothpick in the middle, lodging it into the sandy floor. Bucky drifted down next to it, admiring it. He hoped Steve and him could do something just and fun tomorrow and maybe...

Suddenly, Bucky jolted forward as he felt two hand touch his back. Turning around quickly, he blinked a few times before realizing the person in front of him was his dad. Before Bucky could even think, he was pulled into a strong, warm hug. Bucky pulled back to look at his father. His eyes turned red from the tears that couldn't be seen in the water. He pulled into his dad again and let out deep harsh breaths of water as his mom came from out of nowhere and hugging Bucky from behind, sandwiching him in between his parents.  

When they pulled away, Bucky wiped his arm across his nose and sniffled. As all the excitement began to dull down, his parents explained in their underwater language of clicks and chirps, how they would have gotten here much soon but the storm was so strong it threw them off Bucky's path, and how his sister, Rebecca, is with his aunt and she's fine and they didn't wanted her coming all this way incase he was in danger. They said how much they missed and worried about him and how they would never stop looking, and they hugged him one more time. 

The first thing they asked Bucky was if he was okay, has he slept and eaten well, and if he was hurt in anyway. He thought for a moment wondering if he should tell them about Steve. He knew they would be extremely thrown back if they knew a human saw him. However, if Bucky didn't tell them about Steve, he may never convince them to come back here and he may never see his best friend ever again. 

Bucky sighed before looking at his parents and telling them everything. They were completely shocked and their eyes filled with worry, but as Bucky told them how Steve saved him from starving, their eyes filled with something different: gratitude. When Bucky's story was over, they scolded him for letting a human see him, praised him for saving someone, praised Steve for saving Bucky, and brought Bucky into another giant hug and whispered how happy they were to see him alright. 

Best of all, his parents said they could stay until Steve left, and Bucky had never been happier in his life.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a lot more that I want to write that takes places years later and all that stuff. 
> 
> Would you guys prefer one really long story with a lot of chapters, or a series? It'll be the same story either way, just an organizing issue. 
> 
> You're the best <3


	15. Chapter 15

Steve was beyond worried when his friend wasn't at their meeting place. He balanced on his tiptoes, looking out across the water.

No Bucky in sight. 

He paced and sat, and put his feet in the water, and played with the zipper on his backpack, and ran his hands along the ground where their sandcastle used to be. He waited and waited becoming more and more anxious that his friend was now gone, without even saying goodbye. 

Closing his eyes and leaning back onto the sand, Steve thought of the little time they got to spend with each other. He thought of Bucky's icy eyes and they way he would laugh with his whole body. He thought of how Bucky didn't treat him as delicate or frail, unlike everyone else, and how he treated him like his equal. 

Cold wet hands touched his feet and Steve immediately lifted his head from the ground, sitting up straight. Steve gasped when he saw Bucky, and he grew a smile from ear to ear. "Jerk! You scared me!" He yelled and he shoved his friend playfully. 

"I know, I know," Bucky guiltily replied, "But, I got some good news!"

Steve looked at him with bright eyes as Bucky said how his parents found him and he could stay for the rest of Steve's vacation. Steve celebrated, cheering and bringing Bucky into wet hug that drenched his jacket. He asked if he could meet Bucky's parents. Bucky said how they probably wouldn't be into that, but they thank him a lot for helping their son, and all that stuff. 

The boys looked at each other. Steve started cheering again and Bucky laughed, overjoyed that they had more time together. 

Even though this was only a temporary fix to their impending problem, they relished in the fact that they still had time, no matter how little that was. 

"Come on, let's play" Bucky said smiling. 

Steve dumped out his backpack with cards, and books, and toys, that he brought to play just with Bucky.

They spent the rest of the day laughing and talking and having the best time in the world, forgetting about the future, and just being were they were right now, giggling on the beach. 


	16. Chapter 16

The next day went by just as quickly, if not quicker. They met at their spot and laughed and played and talked and enjoyed each other's company. They couldn't have been closer friends despite how little they had known each other for.

Although Bucky was a merman and Steve was a human, they were had very similar interests and personalities. 

Their most noteworthy quality was their bravery. Despite their young age, the boys weren't scared of much at all. They also loved music, especially swing music, except Bucky would move his hands gracefully and curve his body beautifully to the rhythm while Steve couldn't dance for his life, looking unbalanced and lost when trying to move to the songs. They loved playing games. They hated bullies. They were determined and a bit stubborn.

And most of all, they loved each other, and they loved spending time together whether Steve would come in the water to swim with Bucky, or Bucky would come to the shore and lay by Steve. Whether they were talking or playing, or whether they were happy, sad or angry, they would just love being together. 

So when Steve's week was finally over, the boys were heartbroken. They cried and they hugged each other and they didn't want to let go. Steve had to pull away eventually or else his parents would have come over to take him away and Steve couldn't let them see Bucky.

They waved and waved at each other, not having the strength in their voices to actually utter the word "Goodbye" their cheeks stained with tears. "I'll see you again, I promise." Steve whispered under his breath just as his feet left the sand and entered the car.

Steve's mom saw her teary eyed son and reached a hand over to his shoulder. "Don't cry, love. Maybe we'll be back next year." She sympathetically said, trying to soothe him. It actually helped a lot to hear those words, to give him hope that he might see his friend again.

Steve looked out the window as the car rolled away from the beautiful golden beach. He looked at the sun setting, reflecting oranges and pinks into the ocean. Bucky was long gone into the water, but Steve could still imagine him laying in the shallow water by the shore, his beautiful tail laying out behind, resting his head on his hands, his elbows dug into the sand. 

He let out a shaky breath and reached into his pocket, pulling out the shells he found on the day Bucky had saved him. Weakly smiling, he held them close remembering Bucky's worried eyes the first time he ever saw him.

He wished he could do it all over again, he wished he could see Bucky everyday, he wished he could be with Bucky or Bucky could be with him and they could spend forever together. But Steve was going home and Bucky was going home, and there was nothing he could do the change it. 

Steve closed his eyes and wished with all his heart that his mother would be right.


	17. Chapter 17

In what only could be described at fate, Steve was being able to go back to the ocean every summer, and Bucky was always waiting for him. 

When they were kids they would play all day until the sun went down and Steve's parents would call him inside.

Steve would tell Bucky about school and how bullies would pick on him. Bucky would get so rilled up his face would scrunch up in anger and he looked like he was about to crawl his way to the city and punch someone in the teeth right then and there.

Bucky would tell Steve about the adventures he went on with his new group of friends. They called themselves "The Howling Commandos" and they would hang out together and have fun, but none of them were nearly as close to him as Steve was. "You'd really like them," he would say, "Maybe they could meet you sometime, if their parents let 'em!" 

When Steve's dad died, Bucky comforted him, and when Bucky's mom died, Steve did the same. They would sit next to each other and cry and hug each other, and they would talk away their pain together.

They would talk for hours and hours, and as they got older, they would talk through the night. Steve would bring his little lantern and stick it in the sand, so they would just be able to see each other's faces in the darkness. Sometimes they would go on midnight swims. It was so dark that Steve couldn't see anything and he would just trust Bucky to just guide him through the water as Steve just let himself glide in the cool dark ocean, admiring the beautiful bold stars as he went. 

With age, their friendship also became something more. Steve can still remember their first kiss as they both laid on their stomaches looking directly into one another's blue eyes. Steve picked up his hand and rested it on Bucky's cold wet cheek, and before he knew it Bucky leant in and kissed him. They melted into each other instantly, knowing then how perfect they were together. 

As they got older they grew more into their personalities, Bucky becoming a very confident charismatic merman and Steve becoming a very morally conscience and kind man.

However, they remained very similar throughout the years. They were both as stubborn as ever, and couldn't be more adventurous. They still loved to play games together. Bucky always got destroyed at chess when Steve brought his little travel sized game board and Steve would always lose to Bucky's poker game when they got the cards out. Steve still couldn't dance for the life of him, and Bucky could barley hold a pencil.

They both loved each other, similarities and differences alike. 

But the year Steve's mom died, Bucky found himself waiting on the beach all alone. He waited for weeks, staying right by the dock were they spent so many summers before despite their being practically no food, and the actual owner of the beach house almost seeing him on more then one occasion. Bucky waited and waited until the air turned from cool to cold and he was on the brink of starvation. He waited, but Steve didn't come. 

 


	18. Chapter 18

Any other summer, Steve would have been counting the seconds until he got to see Bucky again. Any other summer, Steve would have done anything just to spend one  _day_ with Bucky. Any other summer, Steve would have left everything behind, his job, his home, his friends, and become completely incased in his secret life with Bucky.

But it wasn't another summer, and Steve didn't see Bucky. 

There were so many things that made Steve stay, the biggest being his mother's death. His mom had always been the most caring and kind. She always defended Steve when it seemed like the world was against him.

She would hold him close when he got teased; tell him straight when he was wrong; listen to him when he felt like everything was going wrong. So when she passed, Steve was more than heartbroken.

He felt more alone than he ever had before, and he just made it worse by pushing the little amount of friends he had away, which unfortunately included Bucky. He told everyone off saying how he could get by on his own, but in reality that just made everything worse. 

Steve was also going through a huge change in his life.

His doctor, Dr. Erskine, took a chance on a new cure he was working on to try to help with Steve's many aliments, and by some miracle it worked. After years of doctors trying to help even the smallest of his problems, he finally found one who cured him completely, making him feel better than he had ever before.

However, his doctor quickly passed away soon after, and Steve was left alone to figure out if this "cure" was actually safe and how to act like a normal healthy person after years of taking medication after medication, going to physical therapists, juggling between doctors, spending days in hospitals, and just trying to survive another day. 

If nothing else was there to stop Steve, there was also the fact that the owner of the beach house didn't want anyone over anymore. The owner, first of all, was primarily a friend of Steve's father, so when he passed away the owner really just let Steve and his mother back out of courtesy.

However now that it was just Steve, and the owner was old and tired and didn't want to travel or have guests, Steve was left uninvited back to the house he had spent so many summers before in. 

Any other summer Steve would have found a way to still go that beach to see Bucky But his broken heart and lost identity had taken away his fight, so Steve and Bucky ended up alone. 

 

 


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Bucky has the worst time ever and it's awful
> 
> You can see the end notes for just a quick summery if you want to skip all the awful things (I'd totally understand) 
> 
> I'm so sorry; I'll try to make the next chapter happy, I promise, just hang in there <3

Hunger hit Bucky hard. He had stayed at the dock for far too long and the water had already started to become extremely cold, even for his thick skin. Now he had been swimming for three days straight. 

Bucky found himself fighting off hunger, freezing temperatures, exhaustion, and a broken heart, all while continuously swimming through the vast, daunting waters of the ocean. 

Out of the course of two weeks, Bucky had only had one actual meal and slept as most as 8 hours. His swimming gradely slowed down until it became just a drift in the water, like an empty bottle. He was completely drained. I

What hurt more then the freezing surroundings, or the pains his stomach held, was fact Bucky had no idea what happened to Steve. Bucky would try to fall asleep only to be jolted awake by visions of Steve being killed, or Steve saying to Bucky's face that he never loved him. The thoughts would taunt Bucky continuously.

He tried to imagine Steve being late and him waiting at the beach, or Steve being on a sail boat and finding Bucky floating in the ocean and save him; but the nightmares were stronger than his dreams and Bucky was left with the cold and loneliness. 

The second Bucky heard the motor, his eyes snapped open from their previous haze. He was able to just about able to see through blurry eyes, the rapidly approaching boat. He swam with energy purely derived from his unbreakable spirit.

He only got so far before the boat was practically on top of him. Bucky quickly stopped swimming forwards and started swimming down, knowing he couldn't out swim the boat in his current state.

Bucky soon felt something pull on his arm, hoisting him up back towards the surface of the water. He tried to pull his arm forward, to yank himself free but he found himself getting closer and closer to the surface every second. 

Bucky heard the boat beginning to start again, ready to move. Bucky started swimming without thinking going in the opposite direction that the boat was facing, trying in last attempts to get away. It actually worked for a few seconds, and Bucky could have been free. 

Maybe if he had just one more meal or was able to sleep just one more hour, he would have been able to save himself, he would have then been quick enough to pull himself away before he was face to face with the boat's propeller and his left arm was taken off. He would have then been strong enough to free himself from the hold around him. He would have then been fast enough to get away from the boat forever. 

But he wasn't and he didn't and he was dragged to the surface, blood dripping down him, ribs showing through his thinning body, and eyes red from invisible tears. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bucky is super hungry and it's cold and he's tired and he misses Steve.  
> He's all like, what happened to Steve? And his anxiety is all like "Steve hates you and he's dead" and Bucky's all like "Noooooooo, stopppp" 
> 
> A boat comes by and Bucky is all like "Aw hell no"  
> and the boat is all like "Aw hell yes"   
> And Bucky tries to get away and he looses his arm and the people get him and it's all like  
> "Ahh! No! Why would you do this?"


	20. Chapter 20

The next summer, Steve paid the owner of the lighthouse a well amount of money so that he could stay for the week, but Bucky wasn't there. And the next summers when Steve did the same, Bucky was still gone, leaving Steve in complete darkness of what had happened in the summer he stayed in the city.

He missed Bucky and thought about him constantly. The first summer Bucky was missing, Steve cried, worrying about his friend and blaming himself for not being there the year before. He stayed by the beach through days and nights and even rented a small row boat and search around the water by the beach but Bucky was nowhere to be found. Although there was never sign of Bucky being back to the beach, Steve would still pay the lighthouse owner every summer, in hopes that Bucky had return and was waiting for him like he used to be for so many summers before. 

It had been many years now without seeing Bucky, and Steve had created a whole new life for himself. He had made many friends, gotten a new job and a new apartment.

He worked for a security agency, and although he hated the secrecy of the came with the job, he really got behind how he was fighting to protect people. His friend, Natasha was his coworker, and the best one at the job in the whole facility. She was very quick and smart and really understood people and their workings well.

Her best friend, Clint was almost as good as her, being just as skilled at the job, but having a bit more of a joking and relaxed personality that made him slow down slightly. 

Steve's best friend (besides Bucky) was Sam, who worked as a police officer. Their jobs sometimes intertwined, but Sam much preferred the face to face action of a cop rather then the work in the security agency. Steve was a cop for a while which is how they initially hit it off, talking about their shared experiences and bonding over that. 

They were also friends with an EMT named Bruce, who much preferred medicine to fighting, and Tony, a technician that would gladly hop between their jobs anytime just to hang out but really loved to build things in his spare time. 

Steve had initially only told Sam about Bucky, but he then branched off to Nat who told Clint who told everyone. It was a little embarrassing to first say that he met a merman, let alone was best friends with one, however as a whole they believed him and supported him, only occasionally teasing him.

Steve wasn't always sure if they were just being nice or if they really believed him but it didn't really matter. Steve would only go out to the beach during that one week in summer, so it didn't really come up much in conversation, nor had Steve even seen Bucky in years so there wasn't much news to say about his merman friend. 

But Steve's friends were there for him and supported him, no matter what. 


	21. Chapter 21

"Okay, what's wrong?"

Steve jumped back to reality and swiveled around in his chair to see Natasha looking down on him.

"What? Nothing's wrong." 

"You're a terrible liar, Rogers." She smirked, as she hoisted herself up to sit on Steve's desk. 

Steve looked down guiltily and shook his head with a "you got me" smile. Steve started to swivel back around to face his papers again but Natasha grabbed his shoulder to stop him. He raised his gaze, looking straight into her light green steady eyes. 

She took a breath in, as if to say something, but quickly release it and let go of her grip on Steve's shoulder, changing her mind. Almost glad that she didn't pursue, Steve gave Nat a small smile before turning around again towards his work. 

Tapping her finger once on the desk as a signal she was leaving, she slide of the table elegantly. Her high heels clicked the wood floor as she headed towards the door. 

"Movie at 7:00, right?" Steve said just as before she left the room. 

"As always." She rang back, before walking out. 

Every two weeks or so, their friend group would meet up at Tony Stark's mansion to watch a movie. It wasn't Steve's favorite activity, because he barley ever knew the movies they picked, but somehow everyone else would. However, it was really nice to have everyone together.

On any given day, Steve would be able to catch maybe two or three of his friends at work, in the coffee shop for breakfast, or heading home on the streets, but he would rarely see them all in one day, or any of them at the same time, besides maybe Clint and Natasha because they worked in the same building as him. 

Steve would see Natasha a bit more than everyone else though, because they worked on the same floor and the same division. Clint would come downstairs quit a bit, even though he wasn't supposed to, so they could talk and hang out.

Sam would usually come in to ask for information or for a file or something, even though he was really just supposed to call the agency. He would always stick around for a while too, and talk for a bit, as long as he wasn't there for something important. 

They would see Tony all the time. First off because Steve was horrible with electronics and would always have to call Tony to help find, fix, or explain something. Second, because Tony really just did whatever he wanted, so if he wanted to hang out, he would just come to up to Steve's desk out of nowhere and start talking. 

Rarely he saw Bruce during work, but he was usually at the nearby Starbucks in the morning to get a decaf coffee. Bruce always seemed exhausted and it was sort of weird that he would never get a caffeinated drink, but Steve wasn't one to judge anyone, and he would sit and talk to him if they had enough time before work started.

Even more rarely, Steve would see Thor, who lived out of the country but would pop in every few months and stay for a few weeks. Despite his short meetings with him, Steve found that he was a very happy and optimistic guy who was down for pretty much anything. But, right now it had been a month or two since he last seen him and he doubted he would be at tonight's movie night. 

It was incredible how such different people with such different personalities and stories had come together in such a strong friendship, and Steve was euphoric to finally have so many people standing by him. 


	22. Chapter 22

Steve looked over to see Nat whispering to Sam over by the bar. Sam made looked down at her and when she finished talking, moved his glaze to Steve, who almost audibly sighed. Sam started to walk over, blank expressioned and calm. 

"Natasha says there's something wrong with you." He says more of statement than a question, when he got close enough. 

This time, Steve actually sighed loudly and eased himself onto Starks ridiculously comfy couch. 

When Steve had arrived, everyone but Clint was already there, including the surprise appearance of Thor. Steve said greeted everyone and began to ring up conversation with Tony who wanted to talk about making him a more "user-friendly" phone. 

"I'm just saying, I can make that brick of yours into a slim beautiful high-end piece of equipment that could also replace your work computer. One less thing to worry about. Just think on it, Dorito." Tony said after almost twenty minutes of talking, before tapping Steve chest and walking over to Bruce. 

Steve was left over by the fireplace when he saw Natasha and Sam. 

"Alright you caught me." Steve said as he put his hands in the arm in surrender. 

"So what's got you going?" Sam said, sitting down besides him. 

"It's just, I dunno," Steve sighed out, "It's almost summer again and I just don't know what I'm going to do." 

Sam pursed his lips and nodded. 

Sam had always been supportive of Steve, even though all the talk of mer-people, and his missing friend. 

He took a few seconds before responding to Steve, as if not knowing at first what route he should take, whether to go stern or interrogating or empathetic. 

"The way I see it is you can go out to that beach every damn summer, and wait for your friend, which hasn't worked in...what is it? Years? Or you could try to get the closure you need, the closure you _deserve._ " Sam said in a straight tone. 

Steve looked at Sam for a moment, "And how would I do that?" 

"Well hell if I know, I'm following you." Sam laughed out, right before the lights started to dim. 

"Which one is this?" Clint yelled, and he jumped over the couch landing next to Steve. 

"Wizard of Oz" Tony said a huge screen lowered from the ceiling. 

Steve laughed, quietly under his breath, maybe things would start getting better. 


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Torture 
> 
> Sorry, again <3  
> You can just look at the end notes for a summary

Bucky was rarely allowed to swim freely, barley allowed to eat, sometimes allowed to sleep, and never allowed to talk.  

His life was just a cycle, really. To be hit and hurt and tortured, and then placed in a barely big enough tank and forced to do tricks or look pretty or just plain entertain people in front of groups of people. There was not sense of time, no connections between people he saw, no common place he stayed at. There was nothing grounding him. 

He had no memory of what his life was before. It had been long beaten out of him by his handlers.

There was no memory of what it was like to swim and stretch through limitless spaces of ocean. No memory of eating a fresh tasteful meal. No memory of sleeping without it being from exhaustion.  

And most of all, there was no memory of Steve. There was no memory of him ever being loved for that matter, or ever having a friend, or ever being anything more than an object to anyone. 

At first, Bucky had found with all his might. He was strong and unbeatable and no matter how many times he was trashed, or put out on in the air to dry out, or starved, or shocked with electricity, he stayed strong and held himself together. It was truly incredible at first, how strong minded one person could be.

The saddest part was when he finally began to break. To see such a strong being, such a strong force, actually crumble, after so long had past. It was like a mountain just crumbling to ground right before your eyes, and there was nothing to do to hold it up of put it back together, and you were just there to watch it fall.

But it's not like Bucky remembered it anyway.

He couldn't remember anything different. Everything was always just a constant pain and that was the way it was. 

There were nights before, when his memory was still on edge. He would call out to Steve, even though he wasn't completely sure who that was. He would call for hours and hours, until his voice became rough and horse and he could scream anymore, so he would whisper. But no one would ever come. He would always be left alone in the dark by himself, as the water slowly turned red from the blood that he was shedding from the day's beatings. 

No one ever came, and Steve became a forgotten memory. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bucky is made to preform and stuff and he doesn't remember anything, and it really sucks.


	24. Chapter 24

Sam had really been incredible the last few days, so Steve invited him out to lunch. Steve knew it was a pretty lame way to show his gratitude but he was a bit tight on cash and he wasn't sure what else they could do on his budget. 

Having the week off of work, Sam used all of his free time picking up leads on mermans. He wasn't really a spy, so he got Natasha to feed him leads and he would go scope them out, trying to find where Steve's missing friend could of gone. 

It was really incredible of him to put so much energy into something that didn't really benefit him, and Steve was extremely grateful and kind to Sam for just being so amazing, the least he could do was buy him lunch. 

"Get whatever you want, it's on me." Steve said as they slid into the red and white cushioned booths at the dinner Sam picked. 

"Mm'hmm. You say that now, but I know you're still working off last week's pay." Sam chuckled. Steve smirked and shrugged his shoulders as the waitress came over and asked for their drinks. 

Steve nodded his head as a "Thank you" as the waitress placed the coffee and water they ordered in front of them. Sam picked up a pink sugar packet and began tearing it open as Steve started up conversation, "So how's that new coworker, Rhodes right?"

"Really?" Sam raised an eyebrow, "You want to know about my new..coworker?" he said, tapping the sugar into his cup.

Steve breathed out and shook his head with a smile.

"That's what I thought." Sam leaned back, getting comfortable. "There's nothing yet, every lead has been cold so far." 

Steve took a breath in and held it. He knew that there probably wasn't going to be anything and Bucky was probably lost in the ocean somewhere.

"But" Sam started and Steve looked at him fully for the first time since they sat down. He was blue-green shirt with a bit of a V-neck, with his sunglasses hung in the middle. He looked a bit tired but seemed as alert and ready for action as always, his brown eyes set back at Steve. "We do still have some cards left." Sam finished.

Although it wasn't the thing Steve really wanted to hear, the "But this next one looks like it'll be the one" or "But we know he's not dead because...", but it was something. It was a bit of hope, and it was better than it being the end. Steve knew that when it did end, when there was nothing more for Sam to trace here, when there were no more mentions of merman spottings or anything anymore, there were only two more options. 

Rather search the ocean and hope they stumble upon Bucky or what was left of him, or give up and let go and let Bucky just be a memory or a dream that happened in Steve's past.

And Steve wasn't going to go for the latter.


	25. Chapter 25

Natasha had found something that looked extremely promising but it wasn't like any of the other leads she found before. It wasn't another merman spotting story from another crazy sailor, or a blurry picture from some tourist on an empty beach. This was something completely different. 

This was an event. A "Merman Viewing Event at the AIM Plaza". It seemed extremely promising, very official. Natasha couldn't find it online or even written down on a flyer for that matter. It was a completely quiet, and unknown event that she was only able to find through some intense digging.

Although it was still a very long shot, it was the best thing they've found yet, after almost two weeks of way too many cold trails. Sam had used up all his free time off work plus a week, and driving all over to talk to weird-ass people and search beaches, was starting to wear him thin.

Even though Natasha barely could find any real information about this "event", every source she did find said one thing. The supposed admissions to it was practically 4 zeros than anything they had on them. 

Even though Steve would have gone bankrupt if it meant having a chance to find Bucky, it was much more logical to just sneak in.  

Sam really wasn't a spy. He was smooth as hell, but not in a sneaking around wearing all black kind of way. Natasha, however, was more than happy to step in. Her office space was getting way too cramped and it was almost a gift to be able to do something fun for a change.

Although she loved to do dangerous things alone, she wished she could bring Clint along. He had been getting pretty antsy, just doing paper work, too, and he loved be dragged along on these adventures. But Natasha, kept it hushed between her and Sam, knowing it should be Steve who decides who to tell about the merman search. 

She came over to Sam's apartment the night before to plan their mission. Although they weren't really sure what would be at the Plaza when they get there, they knew it was better to be overly-safe than to be underprepared. 

Sam had rented a small car, that could only just about fit the two of them, so nobody could follow their license plates and so that they would remain inconspicuous. Although he wasn't going to sneak into the building himself, he was going to be their the whole time, waiting in the car with incase anything was to happen. 

They had looked up the AIM Plaza which seemed to be a very fancy place, despite it being in the middle of nowhere with almost no reviews or comments on any of the normal hotel sights. It seemed very out of place, like it didn't really exist, making everything seem very unsettling. She guessed because of the moderately fancy place and the extremely high price of entry, she should probably dress fancy, but bring some casual clothes in a bag as well to leave in the car. 

In another bag that was more of a purse, she packed an old phone so she could call Sam in a pinch and maybe take a picture or two, a fake ID, a pocket knife, and some cash, but not much else. For another mission she would have brought an earpiece to talk to Sam 24/7, or a gun, or something more substantial, but because of the low stakes she decided more conservative was a better approach. 

They continued planning, setting out the times, and the places, looking over lay outs of the Plaza, assuming where the event would be held, packing food for the trip, and coins for the toll or two they would be passing.

It was almost just a fun thing, it was rare they did anything without much consequences. Of course they could always get caught sneaking around, but it wasn't the stuff they were used to with insane people attacking and them trying to save people, it was a much more relaxed thing, but also very exciting and interesting.

Even though this mission was for Steve, it was also something for Sam and Natasha. 


	26. Chapter 26

The left leg of her stockings slid onto her thigh and Natasha sat back down fully in her seat to put on her heels. 

She looked across the street the the golden glowing hotel that looked both alive but empty.

Pulling out his large clunky phone from the car charger, Sam leaned back and took in the building, paying attention to the doors and the staff that would linger inside and out of the place. It was a long ride there in such a cramped space and it felt almost surreal to finally be here, it wasn't anything like the other leads. This one was a real mission. Even if Bucky wasn't in there, this still required stealth and skill and it should be taken seriously.

Sam breathed out his nose, "Ready?" He asked when he saw Natasha had both shoes on. She looked stunning, and it seemed like they were right about the formal attire thing so far. They had only seen two people walk into the building, but they were both dressed rather nicely. 

Natasha wore a long black dress that hugged her snuggly and had a slit in the right side, exposing her long leg that was wrapped in black sheer tights. Her hair was curled and rested on her shoulders lightly, the color matching perfectly to her dark red lipstick. She flicked down the car mirror and licked her finger to fix a touch of runaway black eyeshadow that somehow landed by her cheek, and checked herself as a whole in the mirror before flicking it back up.

She looked at Sam with a devilish smirk, "Always." 

She slid out of the car, and brought the handles of her purse to rest on her shoulder. She walked forward quit a bit before walking to the hotel, so nobody would see where she had come from. 

As she got closer she began to see two figures in front of the doors, probably staff.

 _Front door or back door_ , she wondered as she got closer. She could always find a back door and made this whole thing a stealth mission, or go to the front first so she can assess the situation a lot better. Back doors would always be trickier because it's never sure where they let into or who would be behind them, yet it you get caught at the front door for not having proper credentials for being there, you'll be screwed from the start. 

 _Front door_ , she decided. Two men stood in front of the door wearing all black button downs and trousers. As Natasha approached they didn't move out of the way or even acknowledge her until she was right in front of them.  _A little odd for doormen._

She greeted them with a nod and smiled lightly, looking confident like she was supposed to be there, and just like that she was in. 


	27. Chapter 27

To get in was a lot easier than Natasha was used to, but she wasn't going to complain. This was also just a mission to sneak into a hotel and see if there was a merman somewhere. It wasn't a hostage situation, there weren't any bombs, it was just get in and get out. 

She step through the doors and onto the marble floors of the foyer. It was very empty, which made the open room seem even bigger, it the opposite of ideal for sneaking around and laying low. 

In front of her were two tall sweeping staircases, to the left a doorway and an elevator, to the right an empty reception desk and another doorway were a staff member was helping a well dressed man.

Natasha thought about her next move. It would make sense that the staff was showing the man to the event, and when they were looking up the hotel they did find there was a dinning hall for special occasions somewhere on the bottom floor.

Her best bet was to go through that right doorway, but there would probably be a guard of sorts down there to collect the fee or check a guest list or something to that extent. She bit her lower lip. There would most likely be some kind of staff door that led to the dinning hall directly passing any bouncer, but because the place was so empty they would probably find her snooping around. However, it was most likely the best chance she had. 

Lucky for her, the staff member was still paying full attention to the man in the suit, and she was able to sneak over to the reception desk. As speculated, there was a staff door right behind and she almost smiled as the door opened without a single creak. 

It lead into a small room that only really had a table and garbage bin, but it had many hallways attached that seemed to lead to a kitchen, a bathroom, and a long narrow hallway. She debated sneaking into the kitchen to grab an apron or something to disguise herself as a staff member, but she voted against it, being way too risky and not practical enough. 

She slid off her high heels to silence her movements and crept down the hallway. It was dimly light and appeared to only be meant for one or two people to go down at a time. It led into another room, thankfully empty, that had three more places attached. 

Natasha saw shadows of feet peer in through the crack in the bottom of one of the door and she quickly hid against the wall. The door swung open, so that it almost hit her in the nose and two men dressed in waiter's aprons shuffled in. The closed the door roughly, leaving Natasha fully exposed, but just continued walking down towards the hallway she just came from. 

She waited until she couldn't here there footsteps anymore and quickly put her shoes back on. Hearing the chatter from the other side of the door and seeing the two waiters emerging, she knew this must be the event. 

She instantly opened the door and brought herself in, letting no one see where she had just come from. It was a much smaller room than she had expected, smaller than the foyer which seemed rather odd for a dinning hall, if that was in fact what this room was. 

There were only about fifteen people, but considering the extreme entry fee it was still a very significant attendance. There was low conversation, that was too mumbled for her to hear from her current location so she ventured forward. Everyone was surrounding what appeared to be maybe a water tank in the middle of the room. Natasha came closer with hesitation as she began to meld into the crowd. 

She shuffled in between a woman in a white swooping gown sipping on some cocktail and a man in a tailored suit whispering to a person next to him. She looked peered her head to see what they were all surrounding.

It was a tall tank that fit only one thing. A merman.  

 


	28. Chapter 28

Sam drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. He had been waiting twenty minutes and he wasn't sure how much longer it would be. Going into it, they weren't really sure if this was going to be a pop-in, pop-out situation, or something that would take a few hours. 

He picked up his phone and unlocked it, to make sure he didn't have any messages, and then put it back in the car's cupholder with a sigh.

He arched his head over to look at the hotel. No one else had gone in since Natasha left, and the two people in front of the doors were still there but barley visible from where Sam's car was. 

Turning his head back, he looked at his phone again. He thought about messaging Natasha just for a status report or something, but it was probably best he didn't incase she wasn't in a place she could get a text right now. He didn't like this, feeling like he wasn't actively helping but he also knew that his job was important, to be here in case she  _did_ need back up, but it still made him feel stuck nonetheless. 

He was glad to be here no matter what though, to help be back up for Natasha, to help Steve find closure, whatever it was. This was something he liked doing. It was a pain in the ass sometimes, but it was what felt right, to help his friends, to help people. 

Sam jumped when the car door suddenly opened and Natasha slid in. 

He let out a huge breath, "Are you trying to kill me?" He laughed nervously, completely surprised from her sudden appearance.

Natasha smiled but didn't look at him and took off her shoes, throwing them into the backseat.

"We going?" Sam asked and shifted into drive when Natasha gave a nod.

When they were just out of view of the hotel, Sam looked over to Natasha. The usual blank, collected expression she usually wore was broken by furrowed eyebrows. 

"Well, what happened?" 

Natasha shifted in her seat to prop herself up more. 

She looked at Sam for the first time since she first left and instantly her face relaxed, as if she just realized where she was and who she was with and gained sudden comfort. She smiled and cocked her head before saying, "I think we just found ourselves a merman. 


	29. Chapter 29

Sam had pulled over the car to fully listen to Natasha and her report, about the merman with a grey, blue tail and long brown hair that danced around his expressionless face.

Steve had described his merman to them before Sam's search started, and they knew he didn't have long hair, but he did have a shimmering grey, blue, pink tail...  and was a merman, so it seemed pretty hopeful that this could be him.

But when you walked around you could see his entire left arm was composed of something silvery, perhaps metal (although it showed no signs of rusting) and they never heard of a metal arm from Steve before. 

"We should call him." Sam said once Natasha had finished. 

"We should tell him in person." she said, as she pulled out a tank top and leggings from the backpack under her seat. Sam nodded and pressed his phone to his ear while Natasha crawled to the backseat to change. 

Natasha rolled off her tights as she listen to Sam talk. 

"Hey man. 

You guessed it.

Sure thing.

Your place, unless you want to meet up somewhere.

Yep.

Alright, we wont be there for about...three hours though.

Great, see you then."

Natasha smiled and put a hand on Sam's shoulder from behind while her other hand pulled down the rest of her tank top. Sam exhaled with the soft touch, and push the keys forward to start the engine back up. 

Natasha slid back into the front and Sam added a "You ready?" before shifted into drive.

She smiled smugly and stretch the seatbelt over her chest, "I play the music this time."  

 


	30. Chapter 30

Steve wasn't really one to get anxious, but tonight he found himself full of nerves. The phone call he got from Sam had him practically pacing. Although Sam didn't really say much in their brief conversation, Steve  _did_ know that this was about Bucky. 

He also knew that Natasha and Sam wouldn't be at his place until almost 3:00 AM, and despite having already been in bed, Steve was completely wide awake now.

The lights flickered on in the kitchen so he could make himself a coffee. Although Steve couldn't figure out how the damn thing worked half the time, he got out the coffee machine Stark got him, put in a cupful or two of water, some tablespoons of ground coffee and pressed random buttons, until it finally made a slurping noise and began slowly dripping coffee into the pot.

He leaned against the counter and tilted his head down, a few strands of long blonde hair falling in front of his eyes. His didn't really bother getting into clothes after his call from Sam so he still wore his light grey worn out sweatpants although he did put on a t-shirt that it was a bit tight but still fit okay.  

His hand came up and held his head for a minute before dragging his hair back out of his face, and he stood up straight and grabbed a plain white mug from the cupboard above him. It took a few extra seconds of him to try and stop the coffee machine before he just pulled the cord out of the outlet, and grabbed the pot to fill his mug.

The mug let out a 'clink' as it landed on the table next to the living room couch and Steve sat down with a sigh. He wondered what Natasha and Sam were going to tell him. He wondered if they were going to say they give up looking, or they ran out of places to check. He wondered if they were going to say, the found Bucky, or if Bucky was dead.

If Bucky was dead.

Steve couldn't even handle thinking about it. If Bucky was dead it would be all his fault. _He_ was the one that missed seeing Bucky that one summer.  _He_ was the one that didn't look for him sooner. It was all on  _him_. Bucky could be dead and it would all be his fault. 

Steve took in a shaky breath and quickly got up, grabbed his mug, and walked to the window, trying to get his mind to think of something else. 

He scrunched himself up onto the small ledge in front of the window and looked out into the dark world outside. It reminded him of all those summers ago, when he sat on the edge of that big window in the beach house and looked out onto the stormy sky, worrying about Bucky like he was doing right now. 

Despite completely downing his drink, Steve found himself fading in and out of sleep. What seemed like a half an hour ended up being three hours and Steve jolted his head up as he suddenly heard a car driving up to the building. He looked down out the window, seeing the familiar red flash of hair that was Natasha in the window facing him. 


	31. Chapter 31

The door was flung open before they even got to the end of the hallway. 

"Hey" Steve breathed a little too loudly for the late hour, still clutching the doorknob tightly as his friends walked towards him. 

"Hey man" Sam said in a much softer volume and tilted his head towards the door, in a sign to head inside. 

Steve suddenly realized how much of a presence he was and let go of the doorknob, moving back into his place. Sam patted his chest as he came in and went right ahead to sit at the couch. He was probably exhausted from whatever they had just been doing. Natasha followed and shut the door behind her, motioning Steve to follow her to the couch.

"I made coffee if you want. Uh, it's probably cold by now but I could heat it up." Steve rushed his words, showing very clearly how jittery he was. 

"I got it." Natasha said soothingly, and touched Steve's knee with reassurance as she got up head the kitchen. She walked slowly and quietly, and it made Steve think maybe he was being a bit too loud right now and took a breath in.

"So, uh-" 

"Alright, I'm going to give it to you straight." Sam cut in before Steve could make another sentence. 

Steve paused. He straightened himself up, shoulders tight, back tall, hands holding onto his legs. He looked like he was ready to be hit right in the gut with a baseball bat. 

Sam let in a deep gulp of air, looking stern with pinched eyebrows and tight mouth, but relaxed him face on the exhalation. 

"We  _think_..." He paused and looked into Steve's blue eyes. Steve's were looking back but not really seeing him, stuck in his own head. 

"We think." Sam started again, "We might've found him." 

It took a minute for Steve to react, staying still for a few seconds too long, before his body folded down relaxing and sitting back into the couch. His eyes drifted to the floor and he looked lost, like he didn't really understand what Sam said.

"You gonna be okay?" Sam said and put a hand on Steve's back. 

Steve didn't react to the sudden touch and just answered with a quiet, "Yeah" 

 


	32. Chapter 32

Natasha had come in juggling three mugs of coffee somehow done just the way each of them liked it. She sat next to Steve and handed him his mug. He hugged it in one hand just let the heat warm him. 

"Where did you find him?" He said, coming back to reality.

" _Might've_ found him." Sam corrected, "We still don't know for sure." 

Steve scrunched his eyebrows a bit, and Natasha quickly came in, "It was some sort of party." 

Steve suddenly became much more forced and sat up a little higher, back to his usual Captain like posture. Natasha took that as a signal to continue. 

"I did some serious digging and found talk about a merman a few hours away from here. It was for some sort of event at a hotel called the AIM Plaza. Couldn't find any mention of it written down, complete ghost story." She waited to make sure Steve was still following her. "Did some more work, found a few more people could confirm it but there was a entry fee that would cost more than one of Tony's limousines."

"We decided to sneak in." Sam joined, seeing Steve holding his breath. 

Natasha nodded once and continued "We drove up there and I snuck in the party through the staff door." 

"They place was completely empty, like seriously cleared." Sam added. 

Natasha eyed him and paused a minute to make sure he was done before continuing again, "It was high class, people you'd expect to be spending money on this kind of thing. There was a waiter or two serving champagne and finger food, but there was also a bar with cocktails and a buffet table, real setup for such a small group. When I got there everyone was standing in the middle around a glass tank, and when I got up to it there  _was_ some merman looking person in it-" she said that last part quickly, immediately seeing Steve's eyes widen. "- _But_ , but, it's not certain it was Bucky." 

"What'd he look like?" Steve almost shouted out. 

Natasha listed what she saw, "Long, brown hair. Grey eyes? But they could have possibly passed as blue. Grey-ish  fin, I guess you could say." Then with a different inflection said, "And a metal arm." almost sympathetically. 

Steve seemed to have stopped listening by Natasha last sentence and was feeling fully euphoric with the hope that this could be Bucky. 

Natasha looked at Sam, and Sam got her que. 

"Listen. We're totally down for following this but we don't want to get your hopes up." Sam said bring Steve's attention back outside of his head. "We don't know if this is your merman, if this is some guy dressed as a merman, we don't know." 

Steve nodded slightly. 

Sam picked it back up, "But, Nat was able to find were this guy will be next, so how 'bout you come look for yourself this time?" 


	33. Chapter 33

They were already out on the road again, but this time with Steve.

Steve was driving, Natasha was in the passenger seat and Sam was napping in the back. Sam started off driving because he was stubborn, while Steve talked next to him and Natasha got a bit of rest in, but after an hour they switched. Nat offered to take the wheel so Steve could sleep a bit too, but he insisted he was fine.  

It was odd that there was another one of these events just the next day. Natasha said how when she was talking to the other guests, they said there is usually one everyday for about a week and then they disappear for a while.

This one was at the STRIKE Gardens. It was much farther then the last one, almost 7 hours away and Steve wanted to leave right way. 

They took at quick stop at Natasha's place so should could pick up another dress, and at a 7/11 so they could get more snacks and stuff for the long trip. 

"So what are we looking at." Steve asked, and Natasha picked up her head from her phone. 

"This one's outdoors so it should be easy to get into." She said, "It should be the same type of set up though. Everyone stood around and chatted and looked at the...water, for a while and then food was served. While everyone is eating you'll be able to get a good look in. Then we're out of there. I know how much Bucky means to you, but even if it is your friend, we come back another day we aren't prepared to take him with us." She said the last part straightly, with no room for debate.

"We're. Just. Looking." Natasha added for good measure. 

Steve smiled a little and nodded, adjusting his grip on the steering wheel. 

It only seemed to just sink in how this was actually happening. Back at his place, he was so confident that this will be Bucky, and that was everything. But now he was worried, what if it is Bucky? What if it isn't? Before everything was only important in the present time, but now he had to focus on how he was going to move forward. 

He looked up to see Sam in the mirror behind him, sleeping his head leaned over resting on his shoulder. He peaked over at Natasha who was back to her phone, typing something, then returned his eyes to the road. He wasn't sure what was going to happen, but his friends were there to help him. 


	34. Chapter 34

They switched seats a few times, stopped for some drive-through, turned the music off and on and off again, got dressed in their formal clothes, and then they were there.

When they found the building, Sam slowly drove past so they could see what they were in for. It was a glass building that was tall and slender, meant for maybe offices but there were no signs or advertising to indicate.

To the left side of the building was the gardens. The inside of it was invisible, surrounded by giant hedges, only broken by a giant arced gate that had a single bouncer standing in front of it. It wouldn't be too hard to find some place in the hedges to sneak into on the other side of him.

Natasha had looked up the place on her phone, but there wasn't a lot of details of the gardens itself. When she typed the address it was mostly just pictures of the building. 

She had put on a formfitting, deep red dress that just came to right above her knees, and was now fixing Steve's blue tie.

She knew him to be prepared for anything, always ready to get something done, but now he seemed hesitant. For the first time it looked like he didn't have a plan, didn't know what to do next. It was odd to find herself and Sam as the leaders, and  _Steve_ the follower.

It seemed this was much more important to Steve than she already thought. 

"Sure you don't wanna come?" Steve offered to Sam.

"Maybe next time." Sam replied and unlocked the doors with a click. He had pulled up fairly far away from the building, where the noise from the gathering was gone, but the building was just visible from the horizon line.

Steve held the door while Natasha scooted through the door, then pushed it closed. 

"Ready?" Natasha asked, putting a hand on his arm for reassurance. 

Steve nodded and dropped his shoulders, not even realizing until now that he was tensed up. 

"It'll be alright." Natasha said, straight faced. 

Steve wasn't really sure about that. If Bucky wasn't in there, they wouldn't be much else left to check. If Bucky was in there, what would they do next? There wasn't really any "alright" outcome, anything they did or found would lead to more complexity. But the way Natasha said it, so flatly that it would be alright, make Steve almost believe it. So together they began to walk. 

 


	35. Chapter 35

They snuck around to the back of the garden hedge wall. Steve locked his hands so Natasha could step up to see over. 

It seemed like there was the same amount of people as last time, but the smaller space of the gardens made it appear a bit more crowded. The was an empty area over to the right that was behind some tables. If they could get through the hedges they could sneak out of under the tables and meld into the crowd without much issue. 

They found their spot in the wall and Natasha tried to part the leaves to make way for herself. They were very thick and scratchy, but she could make it through, but Steve was a lot bigger than her and she could easily see him having a problem. She squeezed though, making the leaves rustle a little bit on her way out but not enough to make people turn their heads. 

She wished she could use a blade or snap some of the branches to cut a bit of space before Steve tried to push himself through, but she didn't want to draw any attention, as it was she was already a woman under a table which would be hard to explain if anyone saw her. 

Steve scrunched himself through the leaves, his button-down getting snagged instantly. Branches caught his hair and it perplexed him how seamlessly Nat was able to slide through with barley any problems. But Natasha was always smooth, and he had always been a little too stiff.

Bucky would always call him out on it; like when he tried to teach him to dance and he was all boxed up. He bet if Bucky saw him trying to squeeze through this hedge so ungracefully he would just laugh his ass off. 

He made it through, ungraceful as it was, and Natasha picked leaves of him and straightened his clothes before they poked out from under the table and came into the crowd. There was a small rip in Steve's shirt, but other than that no one could have told they snuck in. 

Natasha slipped her arm around Steve's to play the couple card, and brought him down into a whisper. 

"We'll talk around for a little. When food is served you’ll be able to take a good look.” And nodded her head toward a tall cylinder in the middle of the grounds people were crowding.

This was it. 


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry about the sporadic updates. School is making it hard to find time to write, but I'll keep trying my best to add when I can. 
> 
> Thank you so much as always <3

When the babble of mindless conversation died down and the guests started heading toward the buffet tables, Natasha gave Steve a tap on the shoulder. 

"Just take a look and then we'll go." She whispered, before leaving him and melding into the crowd by the food.

Steve inhaled and looked toward the towering tank of water he had been avoiding. He could see the vague form of a body drift slightly up and down in the small space, back towards him. 

He breathed out. Taking all of his anxiety and pushing it to the back of his head, he walked over. 

It was surreal. All the senseless noises of the party disappeared into white noise and the whirling of the tanks water pump became more and more clear. His footsteps seemed too loud and everything looked sideways, as he walked around to face the man in the water. 

An instant buzz rang in his ear and his body suddenly felt way too heavy. 

"Bucky?" He whispered.  


A shiver ran through him as a similar hand brought him back into himself. 

"We gotta go." Natasha ordered, grabbing his wrist and pulling him away before he even took in what she said. 

His feet followed but his eyes remained on the the glass, or more so his friend behind the glass. 

Natasha dragged him through the front entrance past the bouncer, not bothering to go back through the hedges for their leave. No one seemed to stop them, though. 

Steve kept his eyes locked until he was dragged too far away to see, and then he just looked at the ground below him as Natasha released her hold while they headed towards the car. 

"Was it him?" She asked, looking back to make sure no one was following them. 

Steve paused for a minute too long before looking at Natasha. He rolled back his shoulders to change his posture. looking a little more gathered. Natasha looked up at him, less concentrated on staying undetected and more concerned about Steve. Her eyebrows knitted in an almost motherly type look. 

"Yeah." He breathed out. 


	37. Chapter 37

The car unlocked with a click. 

Natasha opened the backdoor, pushing Steve in before sliding in next to him. 

Sam turned his head around. Steve looked like an empty body; his head was facing downwards just staring at his hands in his lap. 

Natasha craned her out the window making sure they were alone. 

“We alright?” Sam questioned. 

It was directed more towards Steve but Natasha answered, “We’re good. Drive.”

As the car began to roll, Steve returned into consciousness. He furrowed his brows. 

“He looked right at me and he didn’t even know me.” 

To anyone else the tone of his voice would have sounded neutral, almost like stating a fact, but Natasha could feel the anger, confusion, and sadness in the words. 

She turned her eyes away from the window, “It’s not your fault, Steve.” 

“Isn’t it? I’m the one that left him. Someone must have found him when I was supposed to be there for him and…” 

“And now you’re going to get him back.” Sam butted in sternly. 

Steve breathed out. He lifted his head and turned to look out the window. 

He could see the light blur of the garden on the horizon as they drove away from it. Drove away from Bucky. 

Steve let his eyes linger for a second more before pressing his forehead against the cool pane pane of glass and allowing his eyelids to shut. 

“This will be the last time I’m leaving you.” Steve thought to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone. I'm so sorry I'm only just updating now.
> 
> This piece is a personal project so I know it's full of mistakes and blips but looking back at the comments, you all have been so full of love and caring and it really means the world. Your kindness is inspiring. 
> 
> I have a disability and the last summer it's had been a bit hard to write, I'm not sure what this summer will be like but here's at least one more chapter. 
> 
> I cannot thank you enough for your understanding. <3


	38. Chapter 38

Steve woke up as the car stopped in front of Sam’s apartment. 

Natasha was in the drivers seat and Steve could feel the hum of the car leave as she took the keys out of the ignition. 

She turned to shake a sleeping Sam’s shoulder who was hunched over in the passenger seat, while Steve peeled his cheek from the window. 

Sam jolted up at the touch. “Hows longs I sllleep?” He slurred his words. 

Nat snorted a bit of a laugh at her groggy friend before turning around to a drowsy Steve. 

“You doing ok?” She said with the softness of a mother. 

“Why’re we here?” He blinked a few times, trying to adjust from sleep mode to his normal Captain attitude. 

“We agreed you shouldn’t be alone tonight.” She motioned her head to Sam who was rubbing his neck from the uncomfortable sleeping position. 

Natasha unlocked her phone to check the time. 6:31 am. “Or maybe I should say this morning.” 

Steve had slept through the whole ride. Normally something he would feel bad about because it meant Natasha and Sam had to balance driving duty between the two of them through the night, but he had been emotionally and physically exhausted. Actually getting some sleep for once was like a gift from God. 

“Come on, boys. We’ll sleep for an hour then head out to work.” Natasha said, as she gathered their stuff left the car, Sam following behind her, carrying the rest of their gear. 

Was it seriously a weekday? Steve felt like years had past. 

Steve left the car. 

They walked up to the entrance of the apartment complex together. Sam jumbled with his keys before sticking a cooper one into the door. He paused. 

“Shit.” 

Sam turned to face the group. 

“I only paid 12 hours for the car.” 

Natasha fished the keys for the rental out of her sweatpants, which she must have changed into while Steve was sleeping. 

Sam passed the gear he was holding over to Steve as he dashed out toward the car. 

“We’ll see you at the agency!” Natasha called to him before turning to finish unlocking the door that Sam left the keys in. 

Steve had been in Sam’s apartment a good amount of times before so it felt like home to sink into the worn tan leather sofa of the living room.   
He wasn’t sure if Nat had been here before but she looked happy enough slumping into the matching arm chair and closing her eyes. 

Steve wasn’t able to shut his eyes again. His mind was filled with regret, anger, sadness, and desperation, but also hope. 

Bucky was alive. 

That’s all Steve needed right now.


	39. Chapter 39

Steve wasn’t someone who liked to be stuck behind an office computer for many reasons. But today in particular, he thought he would rather be sent to Hell than just sit here doing paper work while Bucky was alive somewhere, trapped and alone. 

It’s not like he was really doing any work anyway. Every inch of his body was buzzing with thoughts of Bucky. So much so that he didn’t even notice Natasha had made her way into his office and sat on his desk. 

“Now you’re just being rude.” 

“What?” Steve shook his head back into consciousness. 

“I’ve been here for like five minutes. You could at least say, ‘Hi’.” 

Steve rubbed his eyes. Natasha was well put together in a grey jumpsuit and heels. Even he couldn’t tell she had been out mermaid hunting through the night and he was there with her. Himself, on the other hand, must have looked like he just finished a 6 hour hike. 

“Listen,” Natasha said sternly. She leaned her head in close to Steve’s and pulled out a small scrap of paper from the pocket of her jumpsuit. 

There were three locations written on the paper: “STRIKE Bay, STRIKE Aquatic Center, Pierce Mansion” 

In a whisper she continued, “There are only three more places our guy is going before the event disappears for another ‘who knows how long’. This one is today.” She said pointing to the first location on the list. 

Steve opened his mouth to say something but Natasha beat him to it, “We are not going to the one today.” Her voice was still quiet but sharp. “We aren’t ready and we need time to prepare.

“I don’t think we should go to this one either,” She pointed to the last event, ‘Pierce Mansion’. “From what I heard from the people at the Garden, that’s the finale. Big event, lots of people. No way we can do it just the three of us. And you don’t want to get Clint or Stark involved, true?” 

Steve thought about it for a second, “No, that will be plan B. We’ll go for the middle one. That’s tomorrow?” 

Dling

Steve work phone rang, braking them out of their huddle. Natasha jumped of the table and headed towards the door. She didn’t look back as she said, “I’ll get everything ready.”


	40. Chapter 40

“Where were you yesterday?” 

Natasha behind her to see Clint speed walking towards her. She stopped to let him catch up. 

“A mission.” 

“What mission?”

“None of your business, Barton.”

Clint came to the right side of Natasha and they walked together down the hall. 

Her pocket buzzed. She pulled out her phone to see a message from Sam: “meet 4 lunch” 

“Did it have to do with the paper you just gave Cap?” 

She stopped, breaking for a second from her normal confidence, but Clint continued to walk. This time she jogged to catch up. 

“Theoretically I’m a spy too, you know.” He continued. 

She recollected herself, “This has nothing to do with you.” 

“I never get to join the fun.”

“I thought you said, ‘work is too much work’.”

“Fair. But this isn’t for work, is it?” He smirked. 

Natasha huffed. She grabbed Clint’s purple shirt in her fist and pulled him to the side of the hallway. With Natasha’s heels and Clint being relatively short, they were almost the same size so they could look at each other eye to eye. 

Clint expected her words to come out sharply but instead had the softness of a bedtime story, “This isn’t my secret to tell.” 

Clint was about to say something along the lines of, “‘That hasn’t stopped you before.’ but voted against it. He wasn’t going to push her on it. 

They were like each other’s other half. They picked up where the other had weakness and was there when the other was down. They knew who each were in the now and in past, which was more than any other person could say. Who they were was worlds away but they also were so similar. They could guess each other’s moves before they made them. 

“I’m here if you need me.” He smiled. He squeezed her shoulder. His hand was warm and strong. Natasha wasn’t one to be melted by anyone but Clint was someone safe and that was a feeling she rarely felt in her life.   
He turned and continued down the hall. She watched him go for a second before shaking out of it. This wasn’t about her, this was about Steve and she needed to set her emotions aside, as always. 

As always.


	41. Chapter 41

The bell on the diner door jingled as Natasha enter. Sam waved her over from a corner booth in the back. Natasha slide in to the familiar red and white cushions across from him. 

“Is Steve coming?” 

Natasha shook her head lightly, “He’s out of it today.” 

“Do you blame him?” Sam chuckled, “Hell, I don’t even know how to feel about this.” 

The paused as a waiter placed down cold plastic cups of water that created puddles as the condensation dripped down onto the table. 

“Coffee?” the waiter offered in a nasally tone. 

“Yeah, and uh, we’d like to order now.” Sam said. 

The waiter grabbed a notepad and pen out of their apron and nodded to show they were ready. 

“A BLT for me.” Started Sam.

“White or wheat?”

“Wheat.”

The waiter looked to Natasha who replied,“Just toast.” 

“White or wheat?”

“Wheat.” 

“I’ll bring those coffees in a minute.” The waiter said monotony, turning around and walking away.

“Not hungry?” Sam asked. 

Natasha answered with a small shrug and took a drink of the water. The cool drink felt tingly in her throat.

She set the glass down, “I got a few ideas but I think this is way over our heads.” 

Sam snorted, “You can say that again.” 

“We’ve gotten lucky with going stealth but I can’t see us sneaking a mermaid out of a building without running into something.” 

Sam scrunched his lips and nodded, leaning back against the booth. 

Natasha continued, “I can get gear from the agency—“

“Coffees.” The waiter set down two mugs and small pitcher of milk between them.

Sam grabbed a pink sugar packet and began tearing it open. 

Natasha watched the waiter leave cautiously. 

Sam broke her out of her skeptical gaze, “How we gonna move him?” 

“I already got an order to get a van. It wont be a comfortable fit but maybe we could fit some kind of tank. How we’d get him to the van is another story.” 

“The way Steve talks about him, he’s ready to pick him up and carry him bridal style out of there.” Sam laughed.

“Do we even know if he can breathe out of water?” Natasha tapped her fingernails on the table. She was great at working on her feet and handling the situations that came at her with confidence and efficiently but that didn’t mean she felt good about all these unknowns.

Sam could sense her angst, “We’ll talk to Steve tonight.” He paused as she nodded, but her eyes were distance in thought, “You think we’ll be ready by tomorrow?” 

She looked up at him as the waiter returned, “What choice do we have?”

“Toast for the young lady.”


	42. Chapter 42

Steve woke up as the sun was rising. 

After work, Natasha, Sam, and himself, had gone back to Sam’s place. They talked about how they were possibly going to make this rescue mission work and all in a matter of hours. 

The place where Bucky was going to was a 10 hour drive away and the event started at 9:30 pm. It was a Friday so they all had to find a way to sneak out of work without it being suspicious which was a mission in itself. They then had to pick up a van which Natasha did while Sam and Steve were tasked to find something to put Bucky in once he was in the car all while on staying on a budget because they had no money to do this. 

Natasha was able to get the van even though it was pretty disgusting with sticky seats and an odor like spray-can cheese. 

Sam and Steve spent way to much time looking for some sort of basin. Steve desperately wanted to find something comfortable for Bucky but that was essentially impossible by the short notice, the size of the van, price, etc. What they ended up getting, by Sam’s suggestion was a kid’s inflatable pool. 

If Bucky was the same Bucky he knew as a child, he would absolutely love it. He would laugh his head off and admire the little cartoon turtle print on the plastic. But when Steve saw him at the Garden he looked like a body without a soul. Maybe if there was some life some emotion even sadness or anger or fear Steve would feel better but Bucky looked empty as if drained from the inside out. All Steve wanted to do was make him comfortable and safe and warm but all he had was a cheese van and a plastic circle. 

Sam asked more than once if they should call Tony just to get some cash, Natasha asked more than once if they needed more equipment, and they both asked more than once if Steve really wanted to go through with this. 

Steve had no question in his mind that all he wanted was to get Bucky out of there and to be with him; but now, laying on Sam’s couch watching the sky turn from black to blue, his thoughts started to wander. 

He wanted to be with Bucky more than anything and this would be far from the first time Steve jumped into danger recklessly but maybe he was being selfish. Bucky’s last memory of Steve must have been being abandoned that Summer, did he even want to see him again? And even if he was fine with Steve suddenly and spontaneously stealing him could he even be fine for 10 hours in a kiddie pool inside an old van? He and Sam literally just went to a pet store and grabbed 10 packets of “Salt-Water Tank Miracle Mixture” would that even be safe for Bucky? And then what the hell? Is he just going to live in his bathtub forever? Was this really about saving Bucky or was it saving himself? 

Steve felt cold and alone and uneasy. 

“What’s with those puppy dog eyes, hm?” 

He turned his gaze away from the window to meet the eyes of Natasha who was flopped lazily but delicately in the arm chair beside him. She was smiling softly and her face glowed lightly from the sun that was just starting to appear on the horizon.

Steve could hear the soft creaks of the wooden floorboards from the other room, signally that Sam was awake now too. 

Steve suddenly felt a release of pressure, as if he just resurfaced from a deep dive. In that moment of chaos, double takes, and regret, Steve felt safe.


	43. Chapter 43

Steve wasn’t one to truly deeply feel scared, and right now maybe he wasn’t necessarily full on scared but he could the weakness in his knees as he got out of the van. 

This was it. They were here. It was a painfully long car ride and the van was utterly grimy and gross. The seats stuck to your skin so every time you wanted to move you’d have to peal yourself off and readjust. Undoubtably, the smell was pretty bad but after the third hour of driving you kind of got used to it. 

During the ride, they talked about their game plan, which was basically nonexistent. Like the other event, Natasha was able to find a layout of the building so they had a general idea of what they were doing but honestly there were so many nooks and hallways and rooms connected to other rooms that it all just looked like a maze. 

Not much information was found on the building itself but it seemed to be a kind of marine animal research center that also apparently held event? All these places seemed so sketchy. AIM, STRIKE, there was virtually no information about them at all and that was coming from Natasha who could find anything on anything. 

The general idea of the plan was that first Natasha would go in by herself and scope things out. She would send a text to the boys when they should come and she would meet them by a staff door at the back of the facility. From there who the hell knows, somehow get Bucky, carry him back to the car without anyone noticing, live happily ever after???

Natasha might as well have been a weapons store. She was a brilliant fighter as it was but if anyone was to go after her while she was in there alone, they’d be screwed to last Tuesday. She had on her traditional bracelets that let out a shock of electricity like a taser which she called her “Stingers”. She had a dagger strapped to each thigh and a switchblade in her boots. Instead of wearing a dress and heels she wore tight black pants, a black blazer, and a white undershirt. The outfit was formal enough so if necessary she could blend in with the crowd, free enough so that if she had to fight she wouldn’t be restrained, and dark enough that she could probably hide without too much notice (at least with less notice then a bright red sparkly ballgown). 

Sam and Steve wore complimenting black suits which they picked up from a strip mall shop when getting the pool. They were significantly less prepared in comparison to Natasha but that was always a given on a day to day basis. Sam was a gun kind of man so he had a small pistol attached near his ankles, but he knew if there was any kind of metal detector or security of sorts he’d have to loose it somewhere or hide it better. 

Steve wasn’t one to really want something lethal and heavy on him like a gun Natasha offed him a few flash grenade disks from her pocket and a knife which he took but his fighting style was more to disable any attacker rather than hurt or kill them. Life was precious to all of them, but maybe it was because for so long when Steve was younger his life was on the line, or maybe because he lost so many people that he loved that Steve held every person’s life with such delicacy. 

Once they got there Sam circled the building at almost too safe a distance. They could barley make out the contours of the glass angled building. It was surrounded by trees, the last place you would think for a facility that claims it’s studying marine biology. It looked dystopian as if it was originally built in a bustling city but was taken over by nature. 

They decided to park behind the building and slightly behind some trees. The van couldn’t handle off-roading so they weren’t as covered as preferred but they had to be close enough anyway so they wouldn’t have too walk too far with Bucky. 

As soon as the car stopped, Natasha opened the door. 

“Watch your phones for my message.” She said as she hoped out. At least she knew what she was doing.


	44. Chapter 44

“Let me have a go.”

Sam took a breath, “No no no, I got this.” 

Sam blew deep breathes into the inflatable pool’s nozzle. Nothing happened. 

“Come on, hand it over.” Steve said extending his hand. 

Sam put a finger out in a ‘wait a minute’ motion and blew vigorously into the nozzle. Spit ran down his chin, the pool squeaked but no movement. He wiped the spit from his face,“This is a matter of pride now.” 

Steve put his hands up in surrender. He stepped back and folded his arms over his chest, watching Sam. 

Sam gathered himself and wiped the nozzle. He took a breathe and blew…

“God damn it!” He cursed, throwing the pool the Steve. 

Steve fluffed the plastic, unsticking the sides from one another. He wiped the nozzle from Sam’s saliva and blew. Instantly the pool began to rise. Steve squeeze the nozzle to prevent the air from coming back out. 

Sam look at the pool, betrayed. 

“You gotta prep it.” Steve shrugged. 

“Prep it my ass.” Sam opened the car and began taking out jugs of water and the salt water mix as Steve finished blowing up the pool. 

Steve slid the pool into the back of the van. It fit but the sides of the pool did squeeze against the walls of the car. Steve thought to himself it was probably for the best so the pool won’t be able to slide around so much when they were in movement. 

Sam handed Steve a jug of water and they began pouring. Steve tested the water with his hand. It was cold and reminded him of going into the ocean with Bucky as a child. Steve smiled to himself. 

They opened the salt water mixture from the pet store and poured it into the bath. Steve swirled it around with his hands, “Does this look right?”

They started at the squished kiddie pool covered in little turtle in sunglass cartoons filled with water in the back of the dirty van. 

Sam chuckled and Steve shook his head and smiled.   
Their pockets simultaneously buzzed. Natasha. 

Her message read, “Come to staff door” 

Sam slammed the back of the van shut and clicked the keys to lock it. Steve dried his hands, wiping them on his pant leg. 

Sam looked to Steve, “Ready?” 

Nope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like posting short chapters because it's what I prefer to read and write, but because of this we're almost at Chapter 50! 
> 
> Is everyone ok with short chapters? Do you want me to make this work a series it doesn't become too hard to navigate through or do you like having it all in one place? Please let me know!!
> 
> I can't wait to get to the action but I hope you enjoyed some fluff here.
> 
> Lots of love <3


	45. Chapter 45

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need your help, take this survey! (More info at bottom): 
> 
> https://goo.gl/forms/4g5WwfNMy6M3ZbW92

Steve and Sam approached the door as it swung open. Natasha’s hair was tied back in a loose bun, she now wore a white lab coat that was buttoned up to her neck and had somehow acquired glasses. Wasn’t she only in there for like 15 minutes? 

She motioned them to come quickly. They came in and shut the door. No turning back now. 

Natasha was holding two more lab coats and handed them to the boys. She looked over her shoulder. As they began to but them on. 

“They might be a bit tight.” She said as Steve struggled to button up his chest. 

“You’re not going to like this but the best time to get him is going to be after the event.” Natasha went on, “In two hours.” 

“Why then?” Sam asked as he finished the last button on his lab coat. 

“Theoretically,” She paused, being silent as she heard footsteps move past from outside the door. She continued in a whisper, “That’s when he’ll be alone. For a minute at least.”

Steve stretched out his arms to loosen up the tight coat. 

Natasha continued, “They’ll move him from the big tank to a lab room to prep him to move and that’s our window.” 

Steve was sure if Natasha was there for another 15 minutes she would be running the place herself. 

“Why aren’t we wanting in the van?” Sam spoke up again. 

“You boys can go back if you want, but I have some more blending and digging to do.” Natasha said making her way to leave the room, “If Steve wanted to see him in the meantime too, he is just floating around.” She opened the door to leave and Steve speed walked to follow her. Sam considered leaving back out the staff door but decided against it following them into the main of the building. 

Natasha went down the hallway with confidence. She stopped in front of big metal double doors.

She looked to Steve, “Down here, right hand side.” 

Steve rested his hands for a second on the cool metal push bar before pressing it in and opening the door. 

“Look busy.” She suggested to him before continuing to walk down the hall. 

Sam stood lost for a second before jogging to catch up with Natasha. 

Steve was left alone. The door shut behind him with a click.   
The room dimly glowed a cool blue. Steve could see the water reflection on the wall like at an indoor pool. He looked around the corner to the right to see the huge room. 

People in various uniforms were sprinkled around, setting up buffet tables and plugging in speakers for music. The space was large. It looked like an auditorium without seats. In back the corner there was a bar and some tables that a few people were wiping down with towels. There were chandelier crystal-esk lights that shined a soft amber that contradicted with the overwhelming blue of the room emitted by the gigantic wall to wall, ceiling to floor tank of water that occupied the front wall. 

The bottom of the tank was covered in a gorgeous black sand that sparkled in the water. Small jets in the sand emitted light bubble volcanos that slowly floated to the top of the tank and popped at the surface. Built up on the sides were rocks that created almost like a frame for the exhibit. Of course, drifting lightly in the middle of the tank was Bucky. 

With long hair, Steve could see more prominently his light curls that swirled around his head in the water. Bucky had always been relatively strong and well built but now he looked like he pulled a freight train every morning before breakfast. His chest was wide and broad, similar to Steve’s own. His arms were thick and muscular, or maybe arm was more accurate. His left arm, the silver one, was bright, matching the silver scales in his tail. It looked to be made of plates that Steve could see moved slightly. As Steve got closer he could also see were it connected to his body. It appeared to be welded to him, with thick striped of scar and distorted tissue surrounding where the metal met his skin. Steve winced, hoping the water was distorting what he was seeing. Though, whoever made the arm did a strong job of matching it with his actual one. He was perfectly symmetrical. 

He was just there. Like a doll in a dollhouse. He wasn’t swimming around, he wasn’t looking at anyone. He just existed, suspended in the center of the tank, lightly bobbing up and down. 

Steve hadn’t realized he had walked all the way up to the tank until someone called out to him, “Is everything all set here?” Some tough looking woman with a clipboard said. 

“Uh.” Steve stepped back from the tank, “Yeah.” 

She scrunched her face for a second then relaxed making a mark on her paper, “Fantastic.” She said as she turned around and headed to a woman fixing wires. 

Steve scratched his head at his lame response. He’d try to stay more focused next time but being here with Bucky he felt like a kid again. Even though, Bucky didn’t seem to notice Steve was even there. 

“Okay! It’s a go, everyone out!” The tough woman shouted. Steve backed out of the room. He went around the corner where he came from. He stayed there for a second as the staff filed out of various doors, some passing by him but not paying him any mind. A few staff members wearing white suits took their place which Steve thought were probably the waiters.

However as they took their places two more people came in. One was an older man with light hair and an expensive looking grey suit. The other was a muscular man in black tactical gear with short dark hair and stubble. The waiters stood up in attention as the older man with hands in his pockets made his was across the room and over to two big doors at the left side of the room. He held his hand up and the man in black knocked the tank with two short quick taps and one heavy one. 

With that Bucky broke out of his trance. He looked down to the man. He looked with big doe eyes and furrowed brows, his lips curled inward into his mouth. Steve’s legs felt weak again. He felt Bucky’s emotion, he was there, the person he fell in love with was still there and he could see him and he was living. 

The man nodded his head, Bucky looked to the older man who stared back at him. 

“Open the doors.” The old man called. Two waiters went up to the big doors hastily and with a heavy pull, they were open. A much bigger crowd of ritzy figures filled into the room filling the space. With that Bucky began to dance.

Steve’s heart dripped as he watched. It was absolutely stunning. His movements were elegant as he made impossible dips and twirls in the water. He controlled the space moving across the wide spread of the tank. But it was cold and sharp and Bucky’s face returned to the blank gaze. Steve could hear the echo of Bucky’s laugher dancing together on the beach in the back of his head, over the emptiness that emitted from his movements here. This is something Bucky had loved and replaced they had replaced with pain and spectacle. It boiled Steve, it hurt, it numbed, it attacked him. 

He couldn’t watch anymore. He left through the metals door, the “oo”s and “ah”s of the crowd fading behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I didn't give anyone time on the last chapter to respond but I was too excited to post this chapter!
> 
> To make things easier, here's a survey! It's two questions, anonymous, and you don't have to respond to either if you don't want to! It's just about how I format this work!
> 
> Stay cool <3
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> https://goo.gl/forms/4g5WwfNMy6M3ZbW92


	46. Chapter 46

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who filled out the survey! 
> 
> One long work won over a series, however there was a tie between short and long chapters. So, I’m going to try to make medium sized chapters, haha! 
> 
> Love <3

There were a lot of rooms in the building. Many of the ones Steve saw seemed empty or abandoned. That being said, a lot of the rooms were locked so Steve wasn’t able to explore the majority of the space anyway. 

The rooms he went into, though, were almost identical. They looked as if Banner’s lab back at home was left unkept for years, with medical equipment laying sloppily around collecting dust and notes of symbols Steve didn’t understand half dangling off the walls. 

Steve opened up another room to find Natasha leaning over a folder of papers. She looked up to see him. 

“Did you find your boyfriend?” She smiled. 

Steve rubbed his neck bashfully, “What’d you find?” Steve nodded at the papers. 

“Nothing much,” She teased.

“Lemme see,” He took a step closer and Natasha pulled away. Steve stopped. 

“I don’t think you want to see this.” 

“What is it?” Steve go closer, Natasha picked up the papers into her arms. 

“This isn’t something for now.” 

“What is it??” Steve backed Nat against the wall, she looked at him with sternness. 

“Don’t blame yourself.” She gave him the file, pushing it into his chest, “It’s not your fault, Steve.” 

She left through door he came from. 

Steve tapped the folder on the table, straightening back out the papers Natasha hastily picked up. He looked at the cover, on the tab read, “No. 17” 

He opened up the file to a picture of Bucky.   
____________________________________________________________________________  
Natasha found Sam in a florescent break room looking through the fridge. He looked up as the door opened and was relieved when it was just Nat. 

“How’d the digging go?” Sam inquired, pulling out a orange juice with a post-it note reading “Randy’s” on it. He crumpled up the note and throw it in the trash. 

“Well, just gave Steve a folder full of all the horrible stuff they did to Barnes, so…” Natasha clicked her tongue and sat on top of the table. Sam took a seat and twisted off the cap of the orange juice. 

“Now, why would you do that?”

“He asked.” Natasha shrugged.  
“Nat, seriously.” He looked up at Natasha, “This is a guy already carrying a lot of guilt. You can’t just throw more fuel to the fire.” 

“I was going to have to show him sometime, anyway.”

“But now? Really? Before we even know if we can get him back?” 

Natasha turned her face away from Sam. 

“Not everyone can just push their feelings down like you, Nat.” Sam almost regretted the words as he said them but he knew he was right. He took a swig of orange juice to push down the second thoughts. 

The door swing open and the two of them turned. It was a another worker in a white lab coat. He stared at Sam. Natasha began to get up. Putting her hand in her pocket for a flash grenade disk. 

“Is that my orange juice?”   
____________________________________________________________________________

Steve couldn’t feel his body as he stumbled through the hall. It hurt to breathe. He felt fuzzy. He shut his eyes tight, he didn’t want to exist right now. 

Images of Bucky being tied up and beaten and shocked and prodded and it was his stupid fault. Would it really have killed him to show up for one stupid week to a beach. Why? Why??

He audibly hummed as if his voice would be loud enough to drained out his own thoughts. 

“You okay, pal?” Steve felt a strong arm placed on his shoulder. He opened his eyes. It was the man in the tactical gear from the big room. The one that made Bucky look so sad.

Steve grabbed him by the wrist and twisted him off. The guy grunted in pain, surprised at the aggression but quickly coming into action. “Easy, big guy,” he unsheathed a taser from his belt and let it spark blue bolts. 

Steve balled his arms in fists, ready to go at him. 

“Steve!” Sam’s echoed down the hall and he ran in between them. He held Steve back, but Steve’s eyes still lingered on the man. 

“Hey, man. I’m sorry ‘bout that.” Sam said to the guy. 

“What’s his problem?” The guy asked, waving his taser like a slideshow pointer. 

“He’s got PTSD. I volunteer at a VA so I know him from there. He’s a real nice guy, sorry you caught him at a bad time.” Sam wasn’t a spy but these words came easy to him as they derived from truth. 

The guy thought about it for a second before sliding the weapon back into his pocket, “I get it, man. Don’t sweat it.” He still looked shifty and on edge but at least he backed down. 

Steve huffed in anger. 

“Let it go, man.” Sam talked delicately to Steve. “Best if you just gave us a moment.” Sam said to the guy. 

The guy put his hands up, motioning he understood. He began walking away down the hall but paused for a second, “I’m Rumlow, by the way. Just let me know if you need anything.” 

Sam nodded and Rumlow left, he returned his eyes to Steve who’s anger turned to watering eyes. Sam guided him to sit down on the floor and squatted beside him. 

“Hey, it’s okay. You’re okay.” Sam reassured him. 

Tears held back for years rolled down Steve’s cheeks. He held his head in his hands shaking his head. It’s not okay. It’s not okay. It’s not okay. Steve thought over and over in his head like a broken record. 

“Big breaths, okay? Can you give me big breaths?” Sam tried. Steve inhaled short choppy breathes, tears dripped from his face and stained the carpet, or maybe it was saliva, or maybe snot, his face was too hot and numb for him to tell. 

Sam brought Steve close and held him tight. Steve’s hands lazily wrapped around Sam’s back. “You got this.” Sam said, lightly patting Steve’s back. 

Steve felt far from good but he felt like he could breathe a little better now. He could feel the damp tear puddle he left on Sam’s shirt. 

Steve peeled himself away from the embrace and they looked at each other in the eyes. Steve wiped his nose with the sleeve of the lab coat. Sam smiled at him and Steve gave a weak one back. The crouched in silence for a second. 

Sam broke the quiet, “Some dude cussed me out for drinking his orange juice.” 

Steve huffed a small laugh and shook his head.   
Things really sucked. How he felt really sucked. But this moment on the floor, with someone he loved, being there for him when he need it the most, didn’t suck at all.


	47. Chapter 47

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Violence and Brief Mention of Needles

Steve and Sam had talked for a while before Natasha came out to them. 

Steve’s feelings of hurt didn’t go away but he felt in control of them for the moment after being with Sam. 

As Natasha approach, Steve turned to Sam, “I almost got us busted. Thanks for being there for me.” 

“Anytime.” Sam said cooly. He meant it. 

“It’s almost time to launch.” Natasha said, meeting them at the end of the hallway. She had taken those glasses off and they hung in the lab coat’s pocket. 

“You good?” Sam turned to Steve. Steve nodded. They helped each other off the floor. 

Steve composed himself, straightening out the folds he made in the tight lab coat. 

They starting walking together, Sam went ahead a bit and Natasha held back beside Steve. 

“I shouldn’t have given you the file.” Natasha said softly. She looked straight ahead as she walked, not making eye contact with Steve. 

Steve shrugged, “I’m the one that asked.” 

She turned her gaze to him and he smiled. 

Sam stopped and turned around to them, “Guys, why am I leading? I have no idea where we’re going.” 

Natasha sped up to be in front of the pack. She turned the corner and they were back at the double metal doors that led to the big room. Natasha took the glasses out of her pocket and put them back on. She looked to Sam and Steve who nodded as a sign they were ready. 

She pushed open the metal doors and they snuck inside. 

They held back, just peering around the corner into the big room. 

“Wow,” Sam said under his breath, looking at the massive tank. 

Bucky was back floating in the middle of the tank like Steve saw when he was first there.

Steve looked to the left at the doors where people initially came in from. Now, the last few guests were filling out. The older man was there, shaking their hands and making small talk as they went through the doors. As the last person exited, the man shut the doors himself, with a heavy thunk that traveled through the room. 

The man walked up to the tank, balled up his hand, and hit the glass once. Bucky immediately began swimming up and disappeared at the top. 

“Where’d he go??” Steve looked to Natasha. 

“The top of the tank must lead to the second floor.” Natasha said, turing around to go back through the metal doors. 

“How do we get there?” Sam asked, as he and Steve followed her. 

Natasha looked to the left and right side of the hallway as if she was looking both ways before crossing a street, “I saw an elevator earlier.” She racked her memory, “This way.” She turned right and walked hastily down the hall. Sam and Steve trailed behind her, watching their back and sides to make sure no one else was around. Another split in the hallway, Natasha turned right again, and there was an elevator. She pressed the up arrow and the doors opened. 

They gathered into the space. Natasha pressed the “2” button. The elevator dinged and the doors closed. 

“So what’s the plan?” Sam asked. 

“The second they leave him alone we’ll grab him.” Nat answered.

“And we know they’re going to leave him alone?” 

The elevator dinged again and the doors opened. They could hear people chattering across the hall. Natasha pulled the boys to hide behind a wall. 

They peer over. A group of people in their same white lab coats pushed a gurney. Steve couldn’t see Bucky’s face but could see the blue and silver reflection of his tail pouring off the side of the stretcher. Water dripped down onto the floor as the people opened a door and gathered in. Everyone disappeared into the room expect for one person who stood outside, Rumlow. 

“Come on,” Natasha whispered, beginning to go. 

“Wait, wait, wait.” Sam said, holding her arm back, “That guy knows us.” 

Natasha gave them questioning look, but didn’t push it, “Ok, I’ll distract him. You guys go in.”   
Sam let go of her arm and she went ahead. Steve couldn’t hear exactly what she said but after a second of talking she and Rumlow walked away together and disappeared out of sight. 

He and Sam headed towards the door cautiously. Steve reached for the handle and pulled. The door didn’t budge. 

“Is it a push?” Sam asked. 

Steve looked at Sam with tired eyes and pushed the door. It didn’t move. 

“Oh. Keypad.” Sam smiled and Steve rubbed the crook of his nose. 

“Do you know the pin?” Steve asked.

“How would I know the pin?” Sam asked.

Steve ran his tongue through his mouth, not sure what to do. 

Sam knocked on the door. 

“Hey, what are you doing??” Steve panicked. Sam shrugged. 

The door swung open, a timid person in a lab coat peered out to the two. 

“You locked us out!” Sam smiled. 

The person was taken aback for a second, looking at Sam and Steve with question for a second before opening up the door enough for Sam and Steve to slide through. 

The door clicked behind them. Sam elbowed Steve would shook his head in disbelief. 

The room was big and bright. The white tile floor was wet with puddles. The far wall was one big window made completely out of glass. Steve wondered if anyone could see the van from this room. The other walls were white and had marble counters lining them. There were many cabinets and drawers, a big sink, boxes of papers, wheeling tables with metal tins of medical instruments. 

There were about eight people in the room besides Sam and Steve. They all wore the same lab coat, and they all seemed very busy. Everyone had something they were focus on doing, taking notes, gathering equipment, checking monitors. No one even had a second to realize Sam and Steve had entered the room. Even the person that opened the door had already joined back into the group. 

Steve peered over to see Bucky through the heads of the people gathered around him. He was tied up with out long band over his chest, waist, and tail, and two smaller bands strapping down his wrists by his sides. He was beginning to dry out but was still cover with water droplets that soaked his hair and made his skin glisten in the strong light of the room. Over his mouth was a black mask that cover half of his face. In his nonmetal arm was an IV that connected to a yellow tinted transparent liquid. Attached to his finger was an oximeter. Two pads on his chest connected to a heart rate monitor. 

Sam’s hand on his shoulder made Steve take his eyes away from Bucky.

“They’re not going to leave him alone.” Sam whispered. 

“Hmm?” 

“That guy just said that they’re about to roll out.” Sam motioned his head to a man on a walkie talkie. “What do you wanna do?”   
Steve stood for a minute. Suddenly, the wheels to the gurney unlocked. The walkie talky man yelled out, “Let’s go!” Everyone headed to the door. Someone reached their hand to the door handle. Steve grabbed their wrist. The room paused for a second. 

Steve could here the switch of the walkie talkie. Instantly Sam dove in, pushing it out of the mans hand. Steve twisted the person’s wrist and pressed in on their elbow. The person squealed dropping to the floor. Steve raised his knee and jutted it into the person’s nose hearing a crack as he pulled back. The person feel unconscious to the ground. 

Steve grabbed the knife from Natasha. A figure came rushing towards him. He took the blade running it through the man’s coat and pinned him to the wall. He raised his fist ready to strike when he felt a tug on his elbow. He pushed it backwards colliding it to the person’s forehead, then forward to knock out his original target.   
Zap 

Pain sprang through Steve’s body and hissed around his head. His eyes becoming bleary for a second before he saw the person holding the buzzing blue taser. 

The door opened, Natasha sprang in throwing a knife, nocking the taser out of their hand. Sam came in and grabbed their head, throwing it into his knee. The person coiled to the ground. 

No one else remained standing 

Steve looked over to Natasha, she now had a large black gun in one hand and a tactical belt around her waist over her lab coat. 

“Let’s go.” Steve commanded. 

Sam began to push the gurney. The heart monitor and IV drifted behind, “Uh, do we leave this?” 

Natasha came up, peeling the pads off Bucky’s chest. The monitor made a sharp steady tone. She ripped off the tape holding the IV down and slowly pulled out the needle. Blood dripped lightly out of the site. 

“That’s gross.” Sam stated. 

“Come on.” Steve motioned.


	48. Chapter 48

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Violence

Natasha rushed ahead to hit the button of the elevator. The doors slid open. Sam Tetris-ed Bucky in, moving diagonally into the space. Natasha and Steve tucked themselves into the corner and pressed the ground floor button. 

The elevator started to descend then stopped suddenly. They lost balance at the quick movement. Everything was still for a second before the lights turned red. They froze. They could here an alarm blare from outside the elevator. 

Steve stepped forward. He wedged his fingers between the slit of the elevator doors and pushed them apart. The metal was resistant and heavy but once he let go, they didn’t try to close back together. They didn’t make it fully to the first floor. The elevator shaft make it about half way off the ground. Steve was able to slide through. He dropped down onto the floor. All the lights were red. The alarm was loud and screeching. 

“I’ll carry him,” Steve reached out his hands. 

Sam and Natasha began to pull of the restraints around Bucky. They didn’t come off. 

Steve turned around at the sound of footsteps. About five people in full riot gear came around the end of the hall and faced Steve. 

“We can’t get him out!” Sam shouted out of the elevator. 

“Take your time!” Steve shouted back, the gang moved closer to, guns pointed upward towards him. 

Sam pulled harder on the bands. No movement. The lights pulsed above them. Steve clenched his fists. Natasha pulled out a knife and began slashing at they bands. They began to fray and break. Steve went for his pocket. The riot team began to shout. Steve pulled out the flash grenades and threw them across the room. He turned away shielding his own eyes from the blast of sudden light. Natasha slide out and landed on the floor. She extended her arms and rushed to the stunned mass. Steve could hear the electric buzz of her stingers. 

Sam shouted out to him and Steve turned around. He held out his hands as Sam lower Bucky into them. He was wet and slippery and cold. 

“Let go,” Steve called up to Sam. Instantly Bucky’s full weight shifted into Steve’s hands. He was significantly heavier than he expected and it almost brought him to his knees. Steve huffed a few times and slide his hands to wrap around Bucky more comfortably. Bucky’s tail made him exceptionally tall and it dragged across the floor out of Steve’s hands. Steve looked down to Bucky’s head resting against his shoulder. He looked peaceful. Steve smiled. 

Sam tapped Steve’s shoulder sharply, “Come on, man!” he yelled. 

Steve began to move forward, the extra weight making him unbalanced and slow. His shirt was soaked and water dripped down his legs and onto the floor. He had to be careful not to slip on puddles created on the smooth tile. 

Natasha moved ahead and Steve followed, stepping over the five riot officers. Sam followed behind. He had taken out his pistol and held it securely in both hands, eyes constantly scanning the area. 

More heavy footsteps could be heard over the alarm.   
Steve started to turn left to return back from where they came from but Natasha continued going straight. He followed her. 

The footsteps got louder. At the end of the corridor was another window like the one upstairs, made completely out of glass from floor to ceiling. This time, outside, there was no question that you could see the van, but you would probably have to know where it was to spot it. It was far in the distance and the bumper could just be visible behind the trees. 

The footsteps were right on top of them, guards surrounded them. 

“Go!” Natasha yelled. 

Sam pointed his gun towards the glass and shot. The glass formed a spiderweb patterned and Sam kicked it down. The shards rained down. Natasha held her arms over his head to protect herself as Sam and Steve escaped through their newly created exit. 

Sam speeded ahead clicking open the back of the van. 

Steve struggled to keep Bucky’s tail from dragging through the dirt while he ran. He could hear the gunshots coming from behind him but he didn’t look back. He hoped Natasha was following him though he had no way to tell. 

He entered into the forest, dodging through the trees, and made it to the van. The back was opened and Steve dropped Bucky into the pool, water instantly overflowed and splashed onto the floor of the van. Sam was already at the wheel. Steve climbed in, stepping over him to sit next to the pool in the back, he shut the back. As soon as he shut it the van jolted forward. More water splashed around. If Steve wasn’t already soaked he was now. 

“What about Nat??” Steve yelled to Sam.

“What do you think I’m doing??” The van made a hard turn. Steve could feel every bump of the uneven terrain. The van stopped in front of the shattered glass wall and Natasha leaped into the van. 

“Drive!” She shouted. 

Sam hit the gas hard and got onto the street. It wasn’t built for speed but in a matter of seconds the facility was already fading into the horizon. 

They were all panting out of breath as Sam turned onto the main road. 

Steve turned around to look at his two partners in crime. Sam brushed off bits of glass from his shoulders that disappeared into the crevasses of the car. Natasha’s lab coat was already taken off and hung on the back of her chair. Steve could see splotches of red soaked onto the white fabric, already starting to turn brown in the air. Natasha seemed fine though setting her glasses into the cupholder and letting her hair our of it’s bun. Steve felt bad for whomever’s blood that was. 

Steve returned back to himself and unbuttoned his own coat. He felt instant relief as he peeled the tight wet costume off his body. He exhaled deeply, closing his eyes and enjoying the small moment of darkness. 

The van bumped sloshing more water onto Steve. He opened his eyes are remembered what was going on. 

Bucky!  
Oh my gosh, they got Bucky! He was actually here, with Steve, right next to him!

Steve looked down to him, and felt the back of his head to unhook the mask on his face. He threw it to the side, in disgust. He rubbed his hand over Bucky’s face were the mask left light red marks. 

They did it. They got him back.


	49. Chapter 49

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Violence and Choking

Bucky’s light stubble that scratched against Steve’s hand as he rubbed his cheek. He could feel the warmth of Bucky’s breath on his finger tips. It made his heart flutter.

Now, being next to him, Steve could see the scars by Bucky’s arm more clearly. The metal attached right into his skin crudely. The metal was cool to the touch and had a red star on the side near the top. On some parts of his tail, Steve could see small scars of slash marks were scales refused to grow back. They were hardly noticeable, even while Steve was sitting right next to him, but still clearly there if you looked. 

Suddenly, Bucky’s head shifted in his hand. Steve retracted, sitting up in attention. A faint groan emitted from Bucky’s throat. 

Natasha turned around in her seat. 

“Everything okay back there?” Sam called over. 

Bucky groaned again. 

“Shhh,” Natasha replied. 

Bucky’s eyes pinched tightly together for a moment before fluttering open. He looked with blank eyes up at Steve.

“Did you just shush me?” Sam asked Natasha, offended. 

Bucky’s eyes darted to Sam.   
“Shh!” Natasha commanded. 

Bucky looked back to Steve. His look continued to be empty, yet not without thought. 

Steve opened his mouth to say something but without warning Bucky’s metal arm shot up and closed around his neck. 

“Oh shit!” Sam yelled, looking through the rearview mirror. 

Steve’s hands immediately gripped around Bucky’s trying to pry him off. 

“B…Buck…” Steve chocked. The metal whirled as it tightened. Steve felt the pressure clog up into his mouth. His eyes began to water and the world became blurred, but he could still see Natasha raise the gun she snagged off of Rumlow. He weakly raised a hand in effort to stop her before his vision cut out. He could hear a light click of the trigger being pulled. Steve was instantly let go. 

He struggled to cough. Cold air rushed into him but he could still feel a pain in his throat as if he just swallowed a gold ball. He blinked rapidly to regain his eyesight and rushed to Bucky. 

Through his bleary eyes he could see a dart in his chest that was slowly draining a yellowish liquid into him. It looked like the stuff that was in the IV earlier. Steve watched as Bucky’s chest rose and fell heavily; he was just unconscious. 

Steve looked over to Natasha who was pulling another dart from the tactical belt around her waist and reloading it into the gun. 

“No sure how long it will last.” Natasha remarked, not even looking up from her task. 

Steve sat back into the puddle of the van floor. He rubbed a hand over his neck. The event would probably leave a bruise. 

“Uhh, we good?” Sam broke out of his own stun, eyes switching between the mirror and the road. 

“Not yet.” 

Steve turned to Natasha who was looking out her window behind them. 

Steve sat on his knees and craned his head to look out the tiny windows on the back door of the van. 

Two long black cars were quickly advancing behind them. Steve watched as the passenger window of the closet car lower. A gun slowly left the car and aimed straight at them.

Steve wave his hand frantically to Sam, trying to find his voice again. “G-go!” He croaked. 

Sam slammed down on the gas.

More water got dumped onto Steve lap. At this rate, more water would be swimming around the van than inside the pool. 

Steve heard to bang of the gun firing, but it didn’t hit them. He peered up again through the window. The gun was pointing downwards, aiming for their tires. The gun fired again. Miss. 

Natasha looked in the center divide and pulled out Sam’s pistol that he rested there. Her window lowered. She pointed to the car that was shooting at them. Miss. Natasha retreated from the window as the other car fired back. This time Steve could hear the ting of a bullet hitting the van. They crew ducked but the bullet didn’t enter. 

Natasha leaned backed out the window. She shot again. Hit. The car spun out, nearly missing it’s own ally. Steve looked out as they got further away from it, stuck sideways in the middle of the road. 

One down. 

Natasha went back out the window as the second car lowered down theirs. Click. Natasha came back in. 

“Where are your bullets?” Natasha shouted at Sam. 

“I don’t know!” Sam raised his shoulders defensively. 

“Who brings five bullets on a mission?”

“You’re the one that packed! You tell me where the bullets are!” 

Bang. Crash. Sam looked to his left to see the side view mirror shattered outside his window. The glass trailed down on the road. 

Bang. Coooosh. Steve felt the van tilt and sink as one of the tires popped. Sam tried to continue. 

Bang. Coooosh. Another tire down. 

Steve could still feel the pain in his throat as he said his command, “We’ll fight.”

“Like we had a choice.” Sam snorted. As the van naturally slowed down, Sam brought it to the side of the road. 

The black car behind them pulled over a good distance behind them. Steve could see four people exit the car, including the driver. Two of them had heavy guns, the driver had a baton, and the other one had the same style taser that he saw by Rumlow and the man in the lab with. 

“Get the guns first.” Steve’s voice was already sounding a bit stronger, but geez was that metal arm strong. 

Natasha was the first to leave the car, followed by Sam. Steve held back for a second and gave Bucky’s hand a loving squeeze before climbing into the front and leaving out the passenger side of the van. He didn’t want to open the back door to expose Bucky even for a second. 

Steve ran full force towards the group. Natasha had already twisted a gun out of one of the enemies’s hands. Sam was going head to head with the taser holder. 

Steve went for the other gun. The person pointed it toward Steve’s head. Steve ducked low, he grabbed their ankles, taking them to the ground. The gun fired into the air. Steve ears rang at the noise. He grabbed the weapon with both hands and raised it in the arm. He brought down the butt of it hard, knocking the enemy in the head. 

Steve got up off the ground. Sam yelled in pain. Steve immediately turned to him, seeing the taser come into contact with his rib cage. He rushed to his aid. Steve drew back his arm and shot a short sharp blow to the back of the attackers head. 

They stumbled backwards at the blow, but quickly regained themselves turning the attention to Steve. They let the taser spark in intimation, before lunging at Steve. Steve went backwards, avoiding the strike. Sam grab them back they back of the shirt and pulled them back towards himself. He got up close and twisted their arm, the taser fell to the ground. 

Steve went to pick it up but a sharp pain on his back stopped him. It was the baton. He turned around and another strike hit him on the chest. The baton swung again, but this time Steve got it. The impact made his hand feel raw but he pulled it out of the enemies’s hand. They instantly became smaller. 

They held up their hands in surrender but in an instant Natasha ran up behind; using her stingers to electrocute the perpetrator. They fell to the road. 

Steve looked back around. Sam stood over the last person who was out cold. 

The three stood in the middle of the quiet road, four unconscious bodies surrounding them. 

Steve looked to his crew, “I think now’s the time to call for backup.”


	50. Chapter 50

Natasha was the one to call Tony. Nobody was really jumping at the opportunity to tell him that they were a 10 hour car ride away in the middle of nowhere with a merman in their trunk. He was going to make fun of this for the rest of their lives. 

That being said, Natasha wasn’t very generous with information. She didn’t mention Bucky or what they were doing there, just that they were stranded, needed help, a ride with lots of room, and would meet him outside a Motel 6, which according to Sam’s phone was the closet landmark near them.

While they hadn’t seen any average cars going by, Steve didn’t want to leave their attackers in the middle of the street. While Natasha talked to Tony, they dragged the bodies to the side of the road. The crew from the other black car was probably going to find a way to catch up to them so Steve assumed they’d pick up their comrades when they did. 

As they were waiting for Tony to fly his private jet over, their plan was to steal the enemies’ car and to drive it over to the motel. They’d have to ditch the van which hopefully Tony would pay for. At this moment, Steve was glad Natasha was the one to get the van because of course she put it under an alias so they couldn’t be tracked down. She was brilliant at this. 

Steve inspected the car. It was almost like a tiny limo with the driver and passenger set being sectioned off; and in the back seats lining the circumference of the car. While the back was relatively spacious, Steve doubted their attackers were going to take Bucky back to the center in this car. There must be more people coming behind them. 

Steve turned to Sam and Natasha, who ended her phone call with a, “See you soon.” 

“Let’s hurry.” He rallied the troops. 

Sam grabbed the tail end of Bucky while Steve lifted his shoulders. Natasha opened the back door of the car and they slide Bucky onto the back long cushioned seat. They wouldn’t be able to fit the pool blown up in the car. 

Back on the beach when they were kids, Steve remembered Bucky being mostly out of the water for a while and being just fine but he did always stay at least partially wet. Steve wasn’t sure the exact science but he was hoping Bucky would be fine until they had a place to reinstall the pool. Just in case, he soaked his stolen lab coat in the salt water mix of the pool and place it over Bucky’s chest. It would as least keep him damp. 

They rest of the water they sloshed onto the road so they could deflate and fold up the pool to bring with them. They still had one jug of water left and a salt water aquarium packet, so while they wouldn’t be able to fill up the pool all the way like last time, at least it was something. 

They moved the rest of their gear into the car as well, leaving the van the van empty except puddles of water and glass. 

Steve got into the back with Bucky. Natasha joined so in case he woke up, she could shoot another dart. Sam took the front.

It would have been so easy to fall asleep in the car. It was dark, the seats were soft, and they were all running on empty. Pure adrenaline kept them from shutting their eyes, that is until Sam pulled into the motel’s parking lot. 

Sam turned of the engine as they waited for Tony. The car became warm from the Summer heat and exhaustion started to hit them. They had essentially been up for days doing this, running purely on strong will, and now they deserved just a second of peace. 

Steve brushed Bucky’s hair behind his ears as it got harder and harder to keeps his eyes open. His hair was soft and stuck together in big wet clumps. Steve was kind of digging the long hair. 

He bent down gently and kissed the top of the merman’s dewy forehead. Steve could taste the salt on his lips. It was a small act but Steve could feel his cheeks heat up like the first time he kissed Bucky. He knew Bucky wasn’t himself now but Steve’s heart fluttered imagining that one day he could feel Bucky’s lips against his once again after all these years. 

Steve was able to close his eyes peacefully for the first time in forever.


	51. Chapter 51

Steve woke up to a knocking on the car window. He sat up instantly, fists already curled tight. He looked over to Bucky, who was still sleeping soundly. 

Sam rolled down his window. Steve leaned over to see the source of the noise. 

“Someone want to remind me why I’m here?” Tony lean into the car, resting his elbows on the window. He wore orange tinted sunglasses and a sporty looking grey shirt. 

“Look who finally decided to show up.” Sam smiled to Tony. Tony took himself out of the window to let Sam open his door. Sam patted Tony’s shoulder in greeting. 

“You’re the one who didn’t invite me.” Tony retorted. 

“That was me, actually.” Steve slide out of the back seat, shutting the door behind him. Natasha followed from the other side of the car. She walked around to stand with the group, holding the gun she stole from Rumlow. 

“Typical.” Tony smirked. He pushed his hands in the front pockets of his pants lazily. “Let’s go. You’ll tell me all about how you betrayed me on the way home.” He nodded to a SUV a few spots down in the lot.

Sam coughed, “Well, uh, part of that we’ll tell you now.” Sam looked to Steve. 

Steve scratched the back of his head. He smiled a nervous grin looking down at the asphalt as he opened the back door of the car. Steve didn’t look as Tony peeked his head into the car. 

There was a pause before Tony shut the door and turned back to the group. He slowly folded his sunglasses into his left breast pocket. 

“Anyone wanna explain to me why Aquaman is in your car?” Tony quipped. Steve snickered coyly. The team relaxed a bit at Tony’s casualty. “Also why was he looking at me like he already hates me?”

Steve stood up straight, “He’s up?” As the words left his mouth the back glass window shattered. The metal fist clung to the empty window and supported Bucky to push himself up into view. “Shit!” Sam yelled. Natasha raised the gun and pulled the trigger, releasing a dart into Bucky’s chest. Bucky fell back into the car. Steve run up to the car, looking in through the hole where the window was to make sure Bucky was alright. 

“Umm,” Tony clapped his hands together and brought them rest under his mouth, “Okay.”

Natasha opened the driver seat and reach over the divide, grabbing their stuff. “Let’s go,” She called over her shoulder. 

Sam exhaled, stepping over glass to help Natasha. 

“I feel like we should talk about that?” Tony regained himself, “I’d like to talk about that.” 

Steve opened the back door and plucked the dart off of Bucky. He grabbed Bucky, lifting him off the floor of the car and into his hands. Steve inhaled sharply as Bucky’s weight fell into him. 

“We’re not bringing that thing, right?” Tony tried, pointing a finger. 

“Unlock your car.” Natasha called, carrying their gear across the lot. Sam followed behind. 

Tony rubbed a hand over his face before taking the keys out of his pocket. Steve passed him Bucky’s tail slightly trailing behind on the pavement. 

“Of course this is happening.” Tony muttered to himself. The car unlocked with two beeps. 

Sam opened the back door for Steve who sat Bucky down into a seat. 

Bucky’s head slumped over as Steve strapped the seat belt across his chest. Bucky looked so silly. He didn’t quite fit in the seat, his tail curling back around itself to fit in the car. Steve moved the brown wavy hair out of Bucky’s face and tucked it lightly behind his ear to uncover his face. Steve could feel his skin was dry. Looking closer, he could see small pieces of skin starting to flake off his arm and chest. 

Steve furrowed his brows. “Hey,” He turned around to Sam, “I had a wet shirt in the back, can you grab that?” 

Sam nodded in understanding and headed back to the other car. 

Steve went around to the other side of the SUV and got into the seat by Bucky. The car was spacious, clean, and sharp, as expected from a vehicle from Tony. The seats were in rows of two. There were three rows: the front, the middle, and the back where Steve and Bucky were. There was a little aisle down the middle. The car smelled and looked new. The windows didn’t so much as have a finger print on them, and the seats were hard, not broken in yet. Definitely an upgrade from the cheese van and an enemy’s ride. 

Natasha got into the seat in front of Steve, “About two hours, you think?” She turned around to look at him. 

Steve returned a questioning look. 

“The dart lasted for about two hours, you would say, right?” Natasha specified, holding the gun up slightly in her hand. 

Steve hadn’t been keeping track of time. There was so much going on in his head he probably wouldn’t have been able to tell Natasha what day it was anymore. 

“Yeah, sounds right.” Steve offered. 

Natasha smiled, knowing Steve had no legitimacy in his confirmation. She turned back around as Sam opened Steve’s door. The white lab coat dripped into the car as Sam handed it over. “I re-soaked it for you.” Sam winked, wiggling an empty water bottle in his hand. 

Sam shut the door and headed around the car to the passenger seat. 

Steve draped the coat over Bucky.

Tony came into the driver’s seat. He turned around, giving a tired look at the merman and then at Steve. Steve waited for a joke but Tony just turned around and started the engine.


	52. Chapter 52

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Violence

“Someone better start talking.” 

Steve could see Tony’s glare through the rear view mirror. The car stayed quiet.

Steve could hear Tony readjust his hands on the steering wheel. 

“If nobody says anything, I’m fine dropping you off here.” Tony threatened. 

Steve knew Natasha and Sam were waiting for him to say something.

“Alright, kids.” Tony huffed. He sharply pulled the car over. He flicked the hazard lights on and turned around in his seat; eyes darting between the members of the car to see who would talk first. 

Steve brushed his hair back, “Come on, Tony. What do you want me to say?” 

“What do I want you to say?” Tony laughed. “You call me, without explanation, to the middle of nowhere to pick up the three of you the Missing Link?” 

“He’s my friend.” Steve said gently. 

Tony scrunched his face. “Wait, wait, wait.” He unbuckled his seat belt to turn fully around. He looked to Bucky. “This is that guy from your story? When you were a kid? This is serious?”

“You could have pretended to believe me.” Steve scoffed. 

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Tony rolled his eyes. 

“This is why I didn’t call you! Everything is just a joke to you, isn’t it?” Steve’s voice escalated. 

“Are you really going to blame me, Rogers?” Tony practically stood in his chair. 

Sam held out a hand in from of Tony, keeping him in his seat, “Alright, alright,” His voice was firm but calm, “We’re on the same team here.” 

They weren’t even really fighting about anything. It seemed like whenever Steve and Tony were together they ended up yelling at each other, even if there was nothing to yell about.   
They were like dueling siblings. Of course, they would always be there if one another needed help, and they truly cared about one another; but they would often clash heads even for the simplest of things. 

Steve always thought it was because of their way of thinking. He always took things with seriousness and straightness where Tony like to look at things with a light heart and flexibility. But maybe it was something more than that. Steve was never really sure. 

“Start driving.” Natasha’s voice broke through the car.   
“Why?” Tony looked to her. 

Sam sighed audibly.

Steve looked out the window. A long black car slowly rolled up next to them. Natasha got out of her seat and squatted to the floor, out of view from the window. Sam quickly, hopped into the back and joined her as the tinted windows of the black car rolled down. 

“Who is this?” Tony whispered. 

Steve slide out of his seat and joined his crew on the ground. 

He looked to Bucky. 

Steve could hear Tony’s window rolling down. 

Steve clicked the button to release Bucky’s seatbelt and dragged him to the floor. Steve held his head in his lap as Tony’s voice piped up: “Can I help you?” He was as cool and confident as any usual casual conversation. 

Steve could hear the gravel of Rumlow’s voice from the other car, “We’re, uh, looking for a friend of ours.” 

Steve sneered to himself.

“Oh yeah?” Tony paused for a response but none came. “Hope you find ‘em.” Steve could hear Tony shift the gear out of park. 

“Well, wait a second.” Rumlow’s voice lowered, “I think you already have.”

The car jolted forward. Steve head banged into the seat in front of him. He held his hands on Bucky’s shoulders to keep him steady. 

Tony was going fast, but not as fast as the other car. The SUV shook as it was rear ended. Sam fell backwards. Natasha held onto the side of the door for support. 

Steve could feel as the SUV made a harsh turn, his back falling hard into the side of the car. Bucky slid with him. 

“How the hell did they find us?!” Sam yelled over the screeching of the tires. 

The car colliding into them again. Steve held out his hand, guarding himself from hitting the seat again. 

“There must be a tracker!” Natasha’s voice strained. 

Steve looked over his shoulder to the window just as the black car came beside them. It turned right sharply, pushing into their SUV. Steve felt the weightlessness as two of their wheels left the ground. They slid to the other side of the SUV, Natasha falling into Sam and Steve squeezing next to Bucky. 

The other car pulled away. The fell back onto all four wheels heavily. Steve could see Natasha’s head slam into the floor of the car. She winced in pain. Steve held out a hand, but the car rammed them again. They slid to the other side of the SUV. They fell back onto all four wheels. The other car was trying to tip them over. 

Steve braced for the next impact. 

“Friday, counter measures!”

“Yes, Boss.” 

What Steve could only describe as a pulse of energy left the car. He heard a whoosh, a bang, and the far too familiar sound of shattering glass and then they were driving away. 

Steve looked back out the window. The black car had completely flipped over. As it faded from view Steve could make out Rumlow trying to crawl out from a broken window. 

“Why didn’t you lead with that?” Sam peeled himself off the floor. 

“This car wasn’t built for battle.” Tony’s voice was slightly frantic and defensive, “It could only do that once.” 

Steve move his attention to Bucky. He moved his long hair back behind his ear. He was completely unharmed if not even peaceful. 

Steve turned to Tony, “How’d you do that?”

“I have multiple PhDs in physics and engineering and you have a mermaid in my car. How is my thing more surprising? Also, while we’re on the topic, why can’t I question you but you can question me?” 

Steve exhaled deeply. 

Natasha rubbed the back of her head lightly. Her eyes shut tightly. 

Steve switched gears, “Nat, you alright?” 

Natasha opened her eyes to him and offered a weak smile, “I‘m fine. Just lightheaded.” 

Steve offered her a hand to hoist herself up and get back to her seat. 

“You might have a concussion.” Steve said, concerned. 

“I’m fine.” She breathed out heavily as she sunk into the cushion. 

“This is why you wear seat belts, kids.” Tony said lightly.


End file.
